Re: "nappy" vs. straight hair??
Originally Posted by shootout
I hope I'm not out of place posting on this thread, and if I am, I'm sorry.
Despite being white (Irish and Polish), I have extremely thick and curly hair, bordering on nappy. Every woman in my family has thin, straight hair, so growing up my hair was never properly cared for. My mom flat-ironed my hair everyday between the ages of 3-10. At 10 she decided she was tired of wasting time on it everyday, so she got it relaxed. I put up with relaxers every 6 weeks for 3 years, until I was finally allowed to make my own decisions regarding my hair. I got it all chopped off and started over, and I've left it natural since (with an occasional flat-ironing if it's really out of control, but this is rare). To this day my hair feels like plastic. I have scars on my scalp and the tops of my ears from the constant flat-ironing.
I guess the point I'm trying to make is, while natural may not be the most convenient for some, without the proper care, relaxing takes its toll in the long run. So if you're going to relax, PLEASE care for your hair! I regret this everyday now.
Oh my Lord, same thing here on the family pressure front, except I managed to stop it before it went too far!
All of the ladies in my family have poker-straight hair, or just a wee bit of wave, and they'll do anything to get their hair super-straight. I have hair like my Dad's, though, which is fine and corkscrew curly. The thing is, both my dad and his sister keep their hair super-short, so you never really see the curl!
When I was little, everybody loved my curls and thought they were cute. Then I hit puberty, and suddenly it was "poofy" and "had to be straightened." I finally got my hair chemically straightened in the 6th grade, and OH MY GOD, I HATED IT!!! It looked ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE! Not only did the chemicals warp the crap out of my hair, but because my hair is so delicate and fine, it basically looked thin and straggly. Every time I mention this, to this day, my mom or my sister goes, "Oh, it looked so NICE when it was straight!" Half of the time I show them pictures from when my hair was straight, and I'm like, "HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT LOOKS NICE?!" No volume, lanky, unhealthy-looking....UUUUUGH!
I'm happy to say that I've pretty much sworn off straightening my hair for the rest of my life. Since that 6th grade fiasco, I've had it straightened with a flat-iron a couple of times, and every time I think it looks horrible. I did it for pictures once because I planned on wearing a hood, and then I pulled ALL of my hair to the front of my head so it would look very thick. And of course, I got 500 Facebook comments being all, "OH YOUR HAIR LOOKS SO NICE LIKE THIS WHY DON'T YOU STRAIGHTEN IT ALL THE TIME?" I know that 99% of it is coming from people who just like what's "different."
Nowadays, I do what I want, when I want with my hair, and it is super-healthy and gorgeous. I only use one product in my hair, a HG "glaze" that took me years to find; I use a pea-sized amount after my shower at night, then let my hair air-dry, and it completely eliminates my frizz. Other than that, no blow-drying, no gels, no flat-ironing...I use hairspray once in an absolute blue moon, but I always have to borrow that stuff, cause I don't own any!
I know that degenerated in to a rant, and I'm sorry.
It's just very annoying to me when people say I look "better" a certain way, even if I really don't, just because it's what they're not used to or it's what's "in." There's nothing wrong with using lots of products in your hair or doing anything "unnatural," but by the same token, people shouldn't feel forced in to tampering with their hair. Let people wear it how they like, natural or otherwise!
On a random side note: lately I've had a lot of people telling me my hair ISN'T corkscrew curly.
It drives me NUTS! It's like, "Excuse me, it's my damn hair, I know what it looks like!" Then I tell them, "Well, I shower at night and let my hair air-dry, so it's really curly THEN, but I brush it out and braid it at night so when I wake up it's easy to comb out," and they always ask me stuff like, "Well, why don't you just sleep on it without braiding it?" It's like, "Did you not just hear me say it's easier to brush out when it's been braided?!" Lord, the pain I experienced for the 15+ years of my life when I DIDN'T braid my hair at night...LOL!