euphrosyne_rose
Well-known member
Well. After almost 3 years without a relationship or a date, something crazy has happened to me that makes me hopeful things are about to turn around for me. 9 years ago (I was 23), I started dating this guy who was my complete opposite in alot of ways but he was sweet, thoughtful and never shied away from telling me how much he liked me, cared about me, etc. We didn't fight and got along great and had really great chemistry. About 2 months into it, I was at his house b/c I was supposed to stay over and he told me that he had some things going on his life that I didn't need to be around and he said he "almost loved" me and he needed to back away. I was confused though b/c for awhile after that, he still called me all the time and wanted to see me but eventually, he sort of dropped off the face of the earth and I never heard from him again. Of course I was super hurt and it took me awhile to get over it but in time, I healed and moved on but he was always the question mark for me out of all my relationships since I never knew what really happened to him.
So almost 9 years later, about 4 days ago, I was bored while at home and got on FB and started searching for random people I had known and searched for him and found him. After making sure it was him, I went back and forth on whether to send a friend request b/c I thought possibly years ago he had just lost interest and that's why he stopped calling me. Finally I decided it couldn't hurt to send it and maybe I'd get a reply so I told myself to quit being a weenie and just freakin' send it. Well, almost immediately I got an email that he accepted the friend request and then almost right after that he wrote on my wall and said he was shocked to see the friend request and he always wondered where I was and what I was up to and for me to inbox him when I got a chance. I wrote back and said that I almost didn't send the friend request and why plus that I also wondered if he'd even remember me and then told him about my job and where I lived and that I wasn't married and no kids since I had seen he had 2 kids but was single. He wrote back almost immediately again and said, "Call me as soon as you read this! I'm so excited to talk with you finally! Maybe we can do lunch b/c I'd love to see you. I can't believe you're single b/c I am too! You look great. I can't believe you'd think I wouldn't remember you Call me!" and posted his cell for me. I called him right then and when he answered the phone, the first thing he said was how he couldn't believe he was talking to me. We ended up chatting for quite awhile and he told me that for years he wondered where I was and what I was doing but also thought I had gotten married probably. He said he didn't know how to get in touch with me but he said back when he stopped talking to me it was b/c he wasn't a person I needed around b/c he had gotten into some bad stuff and was hanging with some bad people so he got in major trouble and he didn't want me involved in any of it. He said that he had turned himself around and had 2 little girls. He told me where he was working and where he lived and all that and asked if I ever came to town (he lives about an hour from me) but I did say I go there all the time b/c my grandmother lives there and my closest friends so I'm there almost every weekend. He asked when the next time would be that I'd be in town and I happened to have a doctor's appointment the very next day so I told him and he immediately asked me to go to lunch and I agreed. Throughout that conversation and a few others later that day he repeated several times about how happy he was that I had send the friend request and he couldn't believe he was talking to me after all that time. He said I looked great from my pics and I told him I couldn't believe he had thought of me still after all this time and he said he wondered all the time about me.
When we met for lunch, it was like a flashback punch in the gut. He looks 10x better than what I remember (not that I ever thought he looked bad LOL) and all sorts of feelings came rushing back to me, probably unresolved ones from back then that I didn't realize I still had. We couldn't stop smiling at each other all through lunch and he said again several times how happy he was to see me and how excited he was to be there. When he hugged me, he nearly swept me off my feet and I don't think anyone has ever seemed so happy to see me EVER. It was mind boggling. Since then we've talked a few times every day and I'm totally willing to see where things go with him again if he is. He's asked me what I was looking for in a relationship and told me what he's looking for and he seemed really pleased to learn that I love kids and had no problems with him having any. We haven't come out and exactly said, "Hey, let's see where this goes" but he's made allusions to the fact that he's a take his time kinda guy and so that makes me think he's thinking along the same lines as me. We're supposed to see each other Sunday and he's introducing me to his kids but occasionally I do worry that he might just want to be friends. I'm trying hard not to be impatient and to chill myself out but I'm so excited about this prospect in my life, especially since obviously some feelings never went away and he seems like he really HAS turned his life around and is a great person. How do I not drive myself crazy?
Advice?
So almost 9 years later, about 4 days ago, I was bored while at home and got on FB and started searching for random people I had known and searched for him and found him. After making sure it was him, I went back and forth on whether to send a friend request b/c I thought possibly years ago he had just lost interest and that's why he stopped calling me. Finally I decided it couldn't hurt to send it and maybe I'd get a reply so I told myself to quit being a weenie and just freakin' send it. Well, almost immediately I got an email that he accepted the friend request and then almost right after that he wrote on my wall and said he was shocked to see the friend request and he always wondered where I was and what I was up to and for me to inbox him when I got a chance. I wrote back and said that I almost didn't send the friend request and why plus that I also wondered if he'd even remember me and then told him about my job and where I lived and that I wasn't married and no kids since I had seen he had 2 kids but was single. He wrote back almost immediately again and said, "Call me as soon as you read this! I'm so excited to talk with you finally! Maybe we can do lunch b/c I'd love to see you. I can't believe you're single b/c I am too! You look great. I can't believe you'd think I wouldn't remember you Call me!" and posted his cell for me. I called him right then and when he answered the phone, the first thing he said was how he couldn't believe he was talking to me. We ended up chatting for quite awhile and he told me that for years he wondered where I was and what I was doing but also thought I had gotten married probably. He said he didn't know how to get in touch with me but he said back when he stopped talking to me it was b/c he wasn't a person I needed around b/c he had gotten into some bad stuff and was hanging with some bad people so he got in major trouble and he didn't want me involved in any of it. He said that he had turned himself around and had 2 little girls. He told me where he was working and where he lived and all that and asked if I ever came to town (he lives about an hour from me) but I did say I go there all the time b/c my grandmother lives there and my closest friends so I'm there almost every weekend. He asked when the next time would be that I'd be in town and I happened to have a doctor's appointment the very next day so I told him and he immediately asked me to go to lunch and I agreed. Throughout that conversation and a few others later that day he repeated several times about how happy he was that I had send the friend request and he couldn't believe he was talking to me after all that time. He said I looked great from my pics and I told him I couldn't believe he had thought of me still after all this time and he said he wondered all the time about me.
When we met for lunch, it was like a flashback punch in the gut. He looks 10x better than what I remember (not that I ever thought he looked bad LOL) and all sorts of feelings came rushing back to me, probably unresolved ones from back then that I didn't realize I still had. We couldn't stop smiling at each other all through lunch and he said again several times how happy he was to see me and how excited he was to be there. When he hugged me, he nearly swept me off my feet and I don't think anyone has ever seemed so happy to see me EVER. It was mind boggling. Since then we've talked a few times every day and I'm totally willing to see where things go with him again if he is. He's asked me what I was looking for in a relationship and told me what he's looking for and he seemed really pleased to learn that I love kids and had no problems with him having any. We haven't come out and exactly said, "Hey, let's see where this goes" but he's made allusions to the fact that he's a take his time kinda guy and so that makes me think he's thinking along the same lines as me. We're supposed to see each other Sunday and he's introducing me to his kids but occasionally I do worry that he might just want to be friends. I'm trying hard not to be impatient and to chill myself out but I'm so excited about this prospect in my life, especially since obviously some feelings never went away and he seems like he really HAS turned his life around and is a great person. How do I not drive myself crazy?
Advice?
