do you ever regret falling in love?

[pinkhandgrenade]

i once told myself that i would never fall in love again.

that was after a really, really fcked up two year relationship that kind of fizzled out. and i just didn't want to ever love again.

two years later i meet someone in a random class that i'm taking, we start hanging out and i'm thinking, he and i are just friend. things get intense, and i fight him over and over and over. because the more i like someone, the more likely i am to fight them. i tell him he's too good for, i give him every reason to not want to be with me, including cheating on him.

and the thing is, i do all of this to sabotage myself because relationships scare the SHIT out of me. i had one that was so fcking ridiculous and messed up, i've seen too many fall apart, etc.

and i've suddenly realized i can't control whether or not i fall in love with someone. and of course, i figure this out when it's too late and he has finally given up.

and once again, i'm telling myself i never want to fall in love again.

WTF is wrong with me?

yeah this is sosososo random.

 

[Lauren1981]

it sounds like you pretty much have it figured out yourself. you sabotage relationships because you're scared but it almost sounds like you're scared because you maybe feel you aren't able to handle a commitment or you think you'll end up f'ing it up anyway. you shouldn't be scared about it because like you just said, you can't help who you fall in love with and there's not sense in taking it out on a guy you love just because you're mad you fell for him, ya know?
if you like/love him i say go for it ;-)

 

[Divinity]

^^
Werd. There's a lesson in all relationships, so if they don't work out learn from it and move on.

 

[User93]

we really cant control it. Love is something more than that. The same as you can never explain what you love a person for - there are millions of good looking people, nice people, fun people, still you feel an emotional connection only with that very special one. I think its better to accept it, harter than try to fight such feelings. Even if the relationship wont work out, i think it will hurt more to try to stop the feeling inside of you. Good luck!

 

[Beauty Mark]

You understand your actions, why not do something about them?

If you still have contact with this guy, why not have an honest chat with him? Explain your actions and explain that you are going to try to improve.

If you don't want to be in a relationship, that's fine, but I'm under the impression you do want to love and be loved but are afraid. Work on trusting someone. Not everyone is bad and many relationships work out.

 

[Simply Elegant]

I think that you need to realize that love isn't necessarily a bad thing and that mistakes will be made by both people in a relationship, not just you. I'd rather experience love and take the good and bad from it than be afraid of it and only be able to take away the bad parts of it. You're really shortchanging yourself by sabotaging everyone who takes an interest in you.