Getting a RESTRAINING ORDER on roommate

Brittni

Well-known member
Recently, my friend and I searched for a third roommate to rent a house with us close to the university I'm starting next month. This was abotu 3 or 4 months ago. We kind of rushed into signing a lease with this chick because the house is an amazing deal... completely remodeled, security, new appliances, everything included, blah blah blah; hard to find in college houses which are usually notorious for parties.

Anyways, there were problems before we even moved in with this girl. She is horrible at communicating. For one, she refused to bring ANYTHING for the house... and when I said I should get the big bedroom b/c I was bringing EVERYTHING (couches, lamps, decor, dishes, pots, pans, etc) her answers would be "well then don't bring it." Uh, hello, somebody does. She also told me once to "Fuck off" because my job was sitting on my ass all day while she works. (FYI I work at a law office, my job alone brings in $4 MILLION to the company and I'm the only one who can do it...) This girl also refused to talk to my friend, the third roommate, for anything. I took sole responsibiliy of fighting both of our battles -- but I never cussed/anything because I knew it could come back to hurt me and I didn't want to live in a hostile living situation... the whole purpose of bringing in a third roomie niether of us knew was to meet new people, have fun, etc.

Well, flash forward to not this weekend but the weekend before. My friend and I moved in on Saturday. This third roomie, who we'll call chickabitch, moved in on Sunday. I offered to help her move in her stuff, like bringing boxes up etc, because it's the right thing to do... not that I wanted to after moving my friend and I in, you know. I never ONCE recieved a thank-you. Btw, this is all just showing you how disrespectful this girl really is and unappreciative. Ok, fine, whatever.

Well that Sunday night we had all previously agreed to sit down and make general house rules. Too bad chickabitch and MY "friend" were already sitting on the porch drinking. So basically I felt secluded and went home to my mom's. I didn't feel the need to be there w/o internet while they were drinking and getting nothing done.

I went back that Monday night. Right when I got home from work, chickabitch layed into me about going home. Uh, I can do what I want. Whatever. Well, then the whole night she had an attitude towards me and invited her bestfriend over. They began drinking hardcore on our porch (fine, even tho they're underage) and came back inside... They ended up leaving the oven on after taking a pizza out for over 20 minutes. Wtf? What if I wouldn't have caught that? I went outside and politely warned her what she did. I said, "I shouldn't have to sleep with one eye opened..." ie worrying about our house starting on fire! Then she said, "Well I wish you would have fucking burned!" OMG. I've done NOTHING to this girl. I'm not one to call "innocent" because I know I'll never be perfect but I've made sure to be respectful, nice, mature, and try to resolve issues b/c I don't want a horrible house situation. K, so my mom was on the phone and heard her say this. I just walked back inside.

I work M-F. Ok, it's Monday night...I'm trying to sleep. They're so drunk they lock themselves out of the house. I didn't know, I was TRYING to sleep. 12:00 a.m. rolls around and they are BUSTING on my windows screaming at me that I locked them out the house. What the fuck!?!? Who does that? NOT me. I was so scared (I can be a wuss LOL) so I just stayed in my room and pretended to be asleep. Well hmm low and behold they got back in the house. Either the doro wasn't locked or idk but I never left my room...and again... my mom is ALWAYS on the phone w/me when I'm at our house b/c of my anxiety and witnessing this shit. Plus my mom is my BFFL, lol.

Well so they get in, are super pissed, drunk, whatever. They end up inviting over 5-6 guys, who look shady as hell, and making a TON of noise. I don't think I'm that hard to live with... I ask for consideration, respect, and communication... is that too much? :/ Mind you this girl has contributed NOTHING to the house... except toilet paper. So w/e. anyways, 1:30 rolls around and they're up/down the stairs and out on our huge deck in the back of the house upstairs... my bedroom is downstairs...and I can hear them PERFECTLY. I had asked them TwICE to just keep it down, not even for the guests to leave. Mind you one of the guests said "do you want a COCK tail" being a gross drunk male. it's my hosue and he's gonna come at me like that? plus he doesn't know my past, and I am very uneasy when it comes to that... who knows what he could've done to me okay...

Well so it's like 2:30 a.m., can't sleep, end up having to drive 1/2 hr home to my mothers house becuz I have fuckin' work in the morning. ?I get pulled over for "speeding" (you know on curbs you have to slow down to like 50 mph, well I didn't slow enough apparently) Anyways, cop let me off b/c I just instanteously burst into tears due to the stress/disrespect/threatening etc. But, that's more proof ok.

Tuesday I wake up, find a voicemail from 12;30 a.m. from chickabitch threatening to bust my windows in if I don't let her in the house. More evidence. Also, she called me again at 3am when I had left the house. Harassment.

Tuesday @ work I break down crying, which I never do -- not professional and I keep my life otu of work, and my friend @ work listens to my problems. I specifically said I was AFRAID to go home -- very true. and didn't want to. So she's willing to sign a sheet of paper saying that. More evidence of how traumatized I am by this situation.

Tuesday I stay at my mom's. Wedensday night I try to go home again and see what the hell chickabitch's problem really is. Well, I come home to find she's used my pizza cutter and other items that are LABELED "please don't touch, propety of britt"... ridiculous, small, petty, whatever. She also stole my mom's lighter and wouldn't give it back? It wasn't hers to take off the counter and use, but whatev. That isn't really anything, just showing her character. So Wedensday night everything's gravy with my "friend" and we're chillin. Chickabitch gets home from work and is an instant bitch. I politely told her I felt very disrespected the other night, keeping me up til 3am, and I shouldn't have to walk on eggshells in my own house. She flips out. Threatens to bust down my bedroom door, fuck my shit up, and put the door back on and I'd never know. WTF???!!!! Who says that!!!?? Even if it's just talk, still. I was raised w/manners. Ay yi yi. K, so my mom is on the phone hearing all of this. Then it's like 1:30 a.m., again I have work and don't want to have to call in the morning like I did the other day to get extra sleep, so I ask chcikabitch to move her car (she parked us in cuz our driveway is small) and she REFUSES!!!! She's playin games. I don't have time for games. My mom even gets on phoen and tells her just let Brittni leave. The girl SCREAMS at my mom saying disrespectful shit like maybe you don't know your own daughter, wtf? lol. I tell her give me back the phone please I won't have you talking to my mom like that. and so then shes like I'll let you leave when I feel like it. I had to end up calling the cops... She finally let me leave right before they came, but I called so it was reported and whatnot.

That's borderline hostage situation even tho she didnt keep me in the house, am I supposed to run in a CITY wher eI'm unfamiliar at 2 in the morning? Don't think so. Not safe.

Ok so...... then Thursday or Friday night, can't remember clearly, I tried going home again while she wasn;'t there -- she works nights til like 11/12 pm. WELL, she purposely took labels off my items like salt & pepper, kitchen utensils, etc, and took my bathroom appliques that I put up in the shower off and hid them. she just threw the labels on the floor that she took off, too, so i'd see them. Obviously doing it to get under my skin. Well apparently my "friend" didn't stick up for me b/c she said "well she just didn't like the labels because she thought it was common area stuff"... IT'S NOT COMMON IF I FRIGGIN BOUGHT IT AND PUT MY LABEL ON IT SAYING DON'T TOUCH. but whatever. thats nothing like harassment or w.e

So I text her on Friday night saying, "If it would be okay with you, would you like to takl on Saturday before you go to work? "She replied hours later, "I thought u would just move out, can't talk, at work"... Obviously she's trying to run me out cuz she wants the big bedroom or SOMETHIN, idk. its gay how shes trying to be best friends with my "friend" now when she never talked to her before... Ok so...she also text me at like 1:05 a.m. asking me "R u with witney" (the "friend" roomie)... how can you act like that.

Anyways theres a lot more nasty stuff she's threatenjed to do... push me down stairs (her bedroom is upstairs) and more. I have proof for almost everything b/c either the third roomie "friend" has heard, or my mom has heard (and underoath she CANT lie, u know, plus call logs so w/e time matches) and voicemaisl, texts, AIM convos, etc.

I haven't slept a single night at the house since we moved in... I am literally SCARED this girl is gonna fuck me or my shit up, you know, or have someone else do it. and I don't get why...
th_dunno.gif
She also makes fun of me saying the landlord says I call too much etc which isn't ture b/c I called him to tell him whats going on and he said he's never said a bad thingm about me and wouldn't, he just didn't understand why I always have to speak for everyone... its b/c the other girls refuse to act responsibility... so whatever...

I don't know, but we're leaning towards getting a restraining order. She can't get away with this. I feel like we have enough proof, but maybe the harass ment hasn't went on "long enough" is what I'm scared of. Mom says we're gonna hire a lawyer after tommorow when we go get the 10-day no-contact order but what if after 10-days they don't extend it? i know she will make my life hell. and I don't want to move out, it's not fair. my "friend" lives there, WE invited this chickabitch to live there, my name is on the lease too, i'm not all about partying/staying up every night -- i work full-time and starting school full-time, etc.... ugh, I'm sooo stressed/nerbvous and I want a lawyer to talk for me becuz I'll either cry or be so scared I won't cry and then I'm afraid they won't take me seriously..

What do you guys think?

I e-mailed a lawyer in massachuettes who deals w/ Restraining Orders and he said that yes if I get one SHE has to move out but she's still on the lease legally so unless the landlord let's her off she has to pay rent... and I already have a TRUE FRIEND who would move-in with us... so idk... but I haven't told my "friend" I'm getting a restraining order b/c shes been so shitty lately - she's 21 but emotionally a 15 y/o and a follower big time so it's whatever...

Pray for me, lol. Sorry this was SO long. I've never dealt w/"drama" like this before or harassment and threats. I had to go back Thurs/Fri and get all my clothes and M.A.C. makeup b/c I don't want them fucking it up, it's worht too much,lol.

P.S. PLease don't reply and tell me to try to talk things out with her. I have tried this more than 3 times, every time I'm at the house and over texts, she blatantly refuses and continues to threaten me.Thgat is why I'm at a stand still. Im not gonna keep banging my head against a brick wall until my skull gets crushed, ya know!

Sorry for crappy typing/spelling... on my new laptop LOL
 

duch3ss25

Well-known member
Oh my, that's a horrible situation to live in. Definitely agree on getting the TRO on this girl. In the mean time, stay as far away from her as possible until you can resolve the situation or get her a** out of that house. With what you shared, I am truly scared of what this girl might do. Be safe
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brokenxbeauty

Well-known member
Whoa, if anyone replies telling you to try to talk this out with her, they're insane!
I'd be so afraid, she sounds absolutely psychotic! I hope you get the restraining order and she gets the hell out of your house asap!
 

MzzRach

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by brokenxbeauty
Whoa, if anyone replies telling you to try to talk this out with her, they're insane!
I'd be so afraid, she sounds absolutely psychotic! I hope you get the restraining order and she gets the hell out of your house asap!


I totally agree. This person sounds like she seriously needs help - does not excuse what she has done, but still. Something is very, very wrong with her and I feel that you should do what it takes to ensure that she is nowhere near you. You need to get out of this situation ASAP. Please be safe.
 

SkylarV217

Well-known member
Britt you've tried everything to talk to this girl believe me I know. I really think you should be safe to live in the house to found and pay to live in. She shouldn't be able to do w/e she wants and get away with it... You didn't even put half of the stuff into the story ...

- I love how you used Chicakbitch =)
 

Brittni

Well-known member
Thank you girls. Like I said I am staying safe by staying at my mom's house right now, but this has just confirmed I need to call my boss tonight and let her know I will be in late tommorow because they only do restraining orders certain times during the day. I am just so so worried that it might not work like not enough evidence or something?? and it will all backfire on me and she'll be even worse! theoretically though then I could get another restraining order but yeah.

Not to mention her cousin lives 3 houses down so I'm afraid HE might have his guys do something, or if she gets restraining order from me then what if she just chills over there... its definitely not further then the feet in the r/o would be so she could get in a lot more trouble.

Thank you all so much for the support. It means a lot b/c this girl tries to make me feel like it's all my fault and just dumb drama, but it's NOT! It's really, really not. I've done nothing and don't deserve this... especially when school starts.

Big Hugs to all of you!! :hugs:

and LOL Yes credit goes to Skylar for the nickname chickabitch ;P
 

MzzRach

Well-known member
Let us know how it goes. Do not let yourself be scared into not moving forward with the restraining order - do what you need to do to keep you and your loved ones safe.

*big hugs* I am so sorry you are going through this and wish you nothing but good things. Hopefully this will be resolved soon and you can put this whole drama behind you.

XO
 

macslut

Well-known member
Hey, first off I am sorry you are going through this. I was stalked for a year and restraining orders are not always the best thing to get against someone who is dangerous. Basically all it is is a piece of paper that says that person has to stay away from you. If the person comes around, you call the police and they arrest the person. Problem is, alot of damage can be done in between calling the police and that person being around. All it may serve to do is to get her very angry and she sounds like she has some real issues. Police are not always fast. The bottom line for you is that you need to stay safe no matter what.

My advice (from someone who has dealt with someone who wanted to kill her...seriously) is to move home. Just move home. She will be less likely to do anything if there are parents that she will have to deal with. She may act tough with you, but when faced with someone's father or mother, she will turn into chicken shit.

Ask your landlord if he will let you out of your lease as he sounds reasonable. (My landlord did let me out of mine and I had 9 months left on it). Because a landlord is required to maintain a safe environment for their tenets (that is simplistic explanation) you can sue to get out of your lease. These are extenuating circumstances.

Keep all documentation just in case you have to sue. Get pepper spray and defend yourself however you see fit. (Another reason to document what is going on) Do what one of the cops said to do when I reported my stalker: Do not let her (him in my case) get close enough to hurt you.

No matter what, you stay safe. I could give a rat's ass if that girl chokes on a piece of chicken. I want you to keep posting here. Private message me if you want to talk.
 

Brittni

Well-known member
Thank you so much macslut.

I have been keeping documentation, and my landlord said he won't let me out of the lease however he would let me sublet but then I'm still responsible for damages, etc. I know I have the wrong mentality of not wanting to let her "win" and stay in the house, but it just doesn't seem fair. It is a good piece of knowledge to know that I can sue the landlord in extenuating circumstances but I'm sure it won't/shouldn't come to that.

Just so scared the judge will think it's petty immature drama... but I honestly in my heart don't feel that way... and I've tried to resolve it, asking her to stop calling me late, etc. Nothing's worked so I don't have many options left, y'know.

Thank you so much. It means a lot more than you girlies will ever know. This girl is just so vindictive! and she doesn't work now until Thursday so I'm afraid to go back to the house if I need anything.
 

Beauty Mark

Well-known member
Can't you have someone take over your lease? Your landlord should be fine if you find someone who'd take your place and assume all responsibilities.

Brittni, some of it is immature drama, but the threats are not. If you have to present your case, I'm sure a lawyer would advise you on it, but in case one does not, stick with the fact she threatened you multiple times for no reason.

You need to get your biggest and toughest friends (if not police) to escort you back there and move your stuff out. If you cannot move everything out, then move out the things that mean the most to you.

I know you don't want her to "win" but I guarantee she will fuck up with this apartment. I don't know how, but it sounds like she's already on the way to a noise complaint/getting busted for underage drinking. If that doesn't happen, her drunk friends will probably destroy the house.
 

Lizzie

Well-known member
I'm so sorry that you're in that situation! It's good that you're staying with your mom and that you're getting a r/o. Whenever a serious incident happens with her, you should always have it on record (with the police if you can) so that there is documentation of what she's doing. It's good you're saving all that evidence because then you'll have a stronger case against her. She seems nuts! I hope everything works out for you.

Stay strong. Usually I'm all about "winning" and not letting people get the best of you, but in this case, the more important thing is that you're safe.
 

macslut

Well-known member
Brittni, this is NOT petty drama. These situations can escalate out of control pretty quick. I was stalked for a year. For about 7 months of that year, I chalked it up to petty drama. I should have nipped it in the bud as soon as I could. Please learn from my mistake.

It is NOT letting her win if you leave the situation. You win in the end. And it will come back and bite her in the ass. One day she will play these games with someone who has gone through it before and she will get the shit knocked out of her.

And I am here to talk to you if you need it. Stay strong, stay safe, and check in often.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Brittni
Thank you so much macslut.

I have been keeping documentation, and my landlord said he won't let me out of the lease however he would let me sublet but then I'm still responsible for damages, etc. I know I have the wrong mentality of not wanting to let her "win" and stay in the house, but it just doesn't seem fair. It is a good piece of knowledge to know that I can sue the landlord in extenuating circumstances but I'm sure it won't/shouldn't come to that.

Just so scared the judge will think it's petty immature drama... but I honestly in my heart don't feel that way... and I've tried to resolve it, asking her to stop calling me late, etc. Nothing's worked so I don't have many options left, y'know.

Thank you so much. It means a lot more than you girlies will ever know. This girl is just so vindictive! and she doesn't work now until Thursday so I'm afraid to go back to the house if I need anything.

 

Monsterbilly

Well-known member
Damn!
That looks like those "made for tv" movies! Write it all in a script and send it to some tv company, at least you can make some money out of it
tong.gif

Now seriously, i don't know what i'd do, that's a horrible situation
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Brittni

Well-known member
Macslut I commend you for sharing your story and becoming so strong. It truly shows a lot about your character and I am glad that you are still here safe to talk about it. I have great compassion for what you went through.

LOL @ Monsterbilly. True that!

I took off tommorow morning so I'm getting all the details/evidence ready tonight and tommorow we're going to file. You know what's effed up? You can only file a restraining order between like 8-9:30 and 1-2:30 p.m. That's so not cool for people who are at even more danger than I am.
 

OfficerJenny

Well-known member
that is horrible. In all honesty, before getting my restraining order, i would mess her up. In really sneaky ways though. put peroxide in her shampoo or something. xD

Good luck with the restraining order though! She better get what she deserves
 

aleksis210

Well-known member
I hope this message didn't come too late, but basically what my boyfriend's dad said to do was screw the restraining order and just move out...you can either call the landlord and tell him/her your situation or not, either way this pyscho bitch gets fucked because now she has to pay your share of the rent. When your done moving out and your safe and sound then you can fuck with her some if you want (that's what I'd do to get back her for all the drama she started with you and it's what she deserves) Make sure she isn't home when you move out and either get some friends (get your badass friends) or get a couple of police officers to escort you (if you live in a small town you might be able to get some firefighters or police officers to help you out). SERIOUSLY, leave now before she messes with your makeup and you do something you regret! LOL
 

Brittni

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by OfficerJenny
that is horrible. In all honesty, before getting my restraining order, i would mess her up. In really sneaky ways though. put peroxide in her shampoo or something. xD

Good luck with the restraining order though! She better get what she deserves


LOL I told my mom that exact thing -- she's lucky I'm not psycho like her or I'd put peroxide in her shampoo... she's already blonde, though.

I don't want to mess her up because I believe in karma. and I don't want anything against me. I'd rather get the Restraining Order and really screw up her "four year plan" of living in this house. I think it would get at her a lot more than me fighting fire with fire.
 

rbella

Well-known member
That's totally ridiculous. You shouldn't live in fear in your own home. I'm so sorry this is happening to you. I'd be a basketcase. {{{Hugs}}}
 

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