sitasati
Well-known member
Ok. I've never really posted much about me or my personal life but this is bothering me a LOT. I need some advice and opinions whether you guys think this is normal or not.
I met a guy online in April of 06. We started talking and it went from talking online to the phone ...yada yada, you know the drill. He's in cali, I'm in Ny. I'm going to be 25 and he is going to be 36. Yes, its a huge age difference but that's not the problem or may be it is? I don't know. To me the age does not matter, the long distance does not matter. So anyway, we talked a lot. I liked (or like?) him and I figured he liked me too. But just didn't say anything about it at the time. This is when we had not met in RL. So I was stupid and didn't know how to play the "game" and told him I liked him more than just friends. He pretty much just ignored the whole thing at first and then became a little open about it later on..may be two months later. He told me his life is unstable and he doesn't know where he will end up and I could'nt just pick up and leave NY because I have my family here and I'm still in school. So I figured ok this is an issue with him. But that's about it. That's where this issue ended, he never brought it up again.
We started talking everyday. He came to NY to see me about 8 months into knowing him and I met him it was nice. It wasn't a "DATE" because we met in a group of friends and we also met the next day just the two of us. Now I'm really shy I didn't talk to him much and nothing happened! No kissing no touching..we just hugged as friends of course and thats about it. He told me he wants to meet just as friends. So after he went back to cali ..nothing changed as in communication wise (we still talk everyyydayyyy).
But I wanted to know what next? As any normal woman would lol. This is where the problems arise. He told me first he's not sure. Much more was said but I'm giving you guys the summary.
Then he told me there was no chemistry, "you're too extreme", I don't see it happen. Oh by the way..after he went back to california..he had met a girl through his family which he started talking to. He told me about meeting girls but not really dating them. So anyway...to make a long story short..he gave me a run around and we decided to be friends so I have to get over it.
OH and! He had told a friend of mine that he didnt see me like that and yet all this time he was talking to me as if I was his girlfriend! Hmph!
So now this girl he had met..he told me what transpired between them since we're friends now :rolls eyes: He was very clear with her about his situation regarding career, location. He told her if she's not okay with it she can let him know. He told her he's pushing towards marriage. Blah blah..you know the clear cut things. She's 29 ...and I don't know much about her. But its been months since I've even brought up anything between me and him or even thought about anything.
But today I feel so betrayed and I don't know if this normal? I'm pretty far in moving on process. But it hit me and I feel like shyt. He was so clear and honest with her but with me he gave me the run around ..and probably lied. He probably didnt like the way I look or whatever but he couldn't tell me to my face. He claims how much he cares for me and how we're such good friends but all of that seems so fake because of what happened. I just need to know if this is normal. Should I be feeling like this?
Thank you guys for reading this ..if you did get this far lol.
I met a guy online in April of 06. We started talking and it went from talking online to the phone ...yada yada, you know the drill. He's in cali, I'm in Ny. I'm going to be 25 and he is going to be 36. Yes, its a huge age difference but that's not the problem or may be it is? I don't know. To me the age does not matter, the long distance does not matter. So anyway, we talked a lot. I liked (or like?) him and I figured he liked me too. But just didn't say anything about it at the time. This is when we had not met in RL. So I was stupid and didn't know how to play the "game" and told him I liked him more than just friends. He pretty much just ignored the whole thing at first and then became a little open about it later on..may be two months later. He told me his life is unstable and he doesn't know where he will end up and I could'nt just pick up and leave NY because I have my family here and I'm still in school. So I figured ok this is an issue with him. But that's about it. That's where this issue ended, he never brought it up again.
We started talking everyday. He came to NY to see me about 8 months into knowing him and I met him it was nice. It wasn't a "DATE" because we met in a group of friends and we also met the next day just the two of us. Now I'm really shy I didn't talk to him much and nothing happened! No kissing no touching..we just hugged as friends of course and thats about it. He told me he wants to meet just as friends. So after he went back to cali ..nothing changed as in communication wise (we still talk everyyydayyyy).
But I wanted to know what next? As any normal woman would lol. This is where the problems arise. He told me first he's not sure. Much more was said but I'm giving you guys the summary.
Then he told me there was no chemistry, "you're too extreme", I don't see it happen. Oh by the way..after he went back to california..he had met a girl through his family which he started talking to. He told me about meeting girls but not really dating them. So anyway...to make a long story short..he gave me a run around and we decided to be friends so I have to get over it.
OH and! He had told a friend of mine that he didnt see me like that and yet all this time he was talking to me as if I was his girlfriend! Hmph!
So now this girl he had met..he told me what transpired between them since we're friends now :rolls eyes: He was very clear with her about his situation regarding career, location. He told her if she's not okay with it she can let him know. He told her he's pushing towards marriage. Blah blah..you know the clear cut things. She's 29 ...and I don't know much about her. But its been months since I've even brought up anything between me and him or even thought about anything.
But today I feel so betrayed and I don't know if this normal? I'm pretty far in moving on process. But it hit me and I feel like shyt. He was so clear and honest with her but with me he gave me the run around ..and probably lied. He probably didnt like the way I look or whatever but he couldn't tell me to my face. He claims how much he cares for me and how we're such good friends but all of that seems so fake because of what happened. I just need to know if this is normal. Should I be feeling like this?
Thank you guys for reading this ..if you did get this far lol.
