Would you give a guy a chance....
- Thread starter Lil_D
- Start date
MACATTAK
Well-known member
From your post it sounds like he told you after you became "official"? That's a really hard question. On one hand, it's great that he told you. On the other hand, this is something I would like to know before becoming "official" with someone. Of course, there are ways to protect yourselves, but for me personally, this would be a deal breaker for me.
panda0410
Well-known member
Nope.... if you plan to stay with this guy then will be long term complications, especially if you plan a pregnancy later on down the track. Its good that he told you before it was too late, but really, this is a long term issue and not something I would be interested in pursuing.
stelu
New member
The truth is 3 out of 4 men have one of the many many different strains of HPV and only a few of them actually cause warts. The fact that he knows he has HPV means he porb had the strain that causes the warts, which are the strains that are least likely to cause cancer of the cervix in women. So odds are you, me, everyone on this site has had sex with a guy who has HPV. That's why it is so important to get a regualr PAP done, that really is the only way to protect yourself from the effects of HPV. (condoms don't offer full protection against HPV or Herpes for that matter, since the virus can be anywhere on the skin around the genitals)
Do you like this guy? Sounds like he's an honest guy who at the very least cares for your health since he came clean about something that most men would have crossed their fingers and kept to themselves.
Good Luck.
Do you like this guy? Sounds like he's an honest guy who at the very least cares for your health since he came clean about something that most men would have crossed their fingers and kept to themselves.
Good Luck.
xxManBeaterxx
Well-known member
Condom is no defense against hpv, remember that... You can still get it even if his warts aren't visible.
A relationship without sex?!? Gooooood God... I wouldn't be able to handle that, so I would never continue the relationship.
A relationship without sex?!? Gooooood God... I wouldn't be able to handle that, so I would never continue the relationship.
hello_my_apple
Well-known member
honestly i can't and wont tell you what to do w/ this one. You know the dangers of HPV and what it can do to you down the line, and you know how you feel about this person. so go w/ what your heart and your common sense tells you. Me- i'd think about it really hard and my decsion would be no, but im not in your shoes so. Good Luck hun.
Dahlia_Rayn
Well-known member
Chance are everyone of us has been exposed to some form of HPV at some time in our lives, remember the warts on your finger, yep, same virus, just a different strain. I think that if you want to be with him, then be with him, he sounds like a standup guy actually to come clean with you. The other ladies are right, condoms don't offer full protection, but I think the best person to speak your concerns to is your gynecologist. She/he can give you the low down on the stats, and what the chances are that you'll get the virus too. The key here is that you stay informed, and don't be afraid to ask your health care provider about the health information you need! I don't have HPV, I am married and don't need to worry about this, but I would give a guy a chance, especially since he was being honest. That quality speaks loads to me!
rockin26
Well-known member
Ok can't believe I'm putting this on a forum but many years ago I contracted warts from a guy, he denied he had it but I knew it was him. I did everything by the book and got treated and had many follow ups to monitor myself and learn everything I could about HPV. About 6 months after I found out I had HPV I met a guy that I fell for big time and before we slept together I came clean and told him about what I had, lucky for me he knew about HPV because his ex had it and was fully sympethetic and didn't let it stop the two of us going out and we were together for 4 years.
What I'm saying is I'm sure it was extremely hard for him to be so honest with you. I lost 5kgs in a week from all the stress I endured worrying what he would think and would he still want to be with me and I was very fortunate to have such an understanding man. Like the other ladies have said allot of people carry HPV some probably know they have it and choose to say nothing, I applaud this guy for having the courage to admit to something that has a stigma attached to it, he must care about you and respect you allot to be so honest. Those are pretty great qualities in a person.
If you really like him and felt the two of you could have a great relationship then I say go for it and give him that chance, be as safe as you can and get checked up more regularly. 8 years on from my HPV and rigorous testing I'm all clear and haven't seen a wart in proably 7 of those years. It can be dangerous but only if you don't get screened and look after yourself. Personally I wouldn't let HPV keep me from someone I thought I could really be with.
Good lucky chicky and please let us know how you go!
What I'm saying is I'm sure it was extremely hard for him to be so honest with you. I lost 5kgs in a week from all the stress I endured worrying what he would think and would he still want to be with me and I was very fortunate to have such an understanding man. Like the other ladies have said allot of people carry HPV some probably know they have it and choose to say nothing, I applaud this guy for having the courage to admit to something that has a stigma attached to it, he must care about you and respect you allot to be so honest. Those are pretty great qualities in a person.
If you really like him and felt the two of you could have a great relationship then I say go for it and give him that chance, be as safe as you can and get checked up more regularly. 8 years on from my HPV and rigorous testing I'm all clear and haven't seen a wart in proably 7 of those years. It can be dangerous but only if you don't get screened and look after yourself. Personally I wouldn't let HPV keep me from someone I thought I could really be with.
Good lucky chicky and please let us know how you go!
gildedangel
Well-known member
I am impressed that he told you about it actually! That takes a lot of guts, and it sounds like he is very honest. If you really like him I would give him a chance. You just need to play it safe and know what you are getting into. Good luck!
greengoesmoo
Well-known member
I have never dated a guy with HPV, but I dated a guy with genital herpes.
It worked fine, and I came away having not caught it when we parted ways, you just have to learn to get super careful.
It's a very good sign that he told you though!
Lots of people wouldn't. He's honest so he's probably a keeper if you can get past the HPV.
It worked fine, and I came away having not caught it when we parted ways, you just have to learn to get super careful.
It's a very good sign that he told you though!
Lil_D
Well-known member
Thank you guys for your input I appreciate it. Well I will be posting another thread to what has been up with me. But to let you guys all know I kept him I didn't care that he had it because he was a keeper but he broke up with me after 8.5 months later. :0( I will keep you guys posted it's gonna be a loooong one to take off my chest.
LoveMakeup4Real
Well-known member
Quote:
So you put your life at risk for a man?!? Who later dumped you anyway? I'm sure a man would not be so forgiving. Although he is not really obligated to tell you anything, he should, nothing to praise him about, tbh.
Originally Posted by Lil_D
Thank you guys for your input I appreciate it. Well I will be posting another thread to what has been up with me. But to let you guys all know I kept him I didn't care that he had it because he was a keeper but he broke up with me after 8.5 months later. :0( I will keep you guys posted it's gonna be a loooong one to take off my chest. |
So you put your life at risk for a man?!? Who later dumped you anyway? I'm sure a man would not be so forgiving. Although he is not really obligated to tell you anything, he should, nothing to praise him about, tbh.
BEA2LS
Well-known member
Quote:
i would not be harsh on her for that.. overly half of sexually active americans have this and almost all were exposed to this.. it usually clears up on its own so many never know. I used to intern at a woman's clinic, this is very common, which is why they made the preventive shot. the link below explains more to anyone who is interested
Human Papillomavirus (HPV) and Genital Warts << Frequently Asked Questions << womenshealth.gov
| Originally Posted by LoveMakeup4Real
So you put your life at risk for a man?!? Who later dumped you anyway? I'm sure a man would not be so forgiving. Although he is not really obligated to tell you anything, he should, nothing to praise him about, tbh. |
i would not be harsh on her for that.. overly half of sexually active americans have this and almost all were exposed to this.. it usually clears up on its own so many never know. I used to intern at a woman's clinic, this is very common, which is why they made the preventive shot. the link below explains more to anyone who is interested
Human Papillomavirus (HPV) and Genital Warts << Frequently Asked Questions << womenshealth.gov
Dahlia_Rayn
Well-known member
Let's also not forget that all strains of HPV are NOT linked to cervical cancer, in fact most strains of HPV, whether they be genital or not, are NOT anything but an annoyance that your immune system generally learns to destroy on it's own within a couple of years.
BEA2LS
Well-known member
Quote:
that is true... it usually does clear on it's own. and again, it is very common. what i find alarming is how many people on this thread alone are scared of this.. does this mean your doctors are not going over this on your check ups? is everyone getting checked up as recommended?
| Originally Posted by Dahlia_Rayn
Let's also not forget that all strains of HPV are NOT linked to cervical cancer, in fact most strains of HPV, whether they be genital or not, are NOT anything but an annoyance that your immune system generally learns to destroy on it's own within a couple of years. |
that is true... it usually does clear on it's own. and again, it is very common. what i find alarming is how many people on this thread alone are scared of this.. does this mean your doctors are not going over this on your check ups? is everyone getting checked up as recommended?
i think it's a tough choice to make really. i know that you have both broken up since but it has got me thinking about what i would do.
my hubby has a wart on one of his fingers which is being treated at the moment - who knows how he got it. but i have been paranoid about ut and don't let him touch my bits with that hand until it is completely gone just in case - silly perhaps but that is just me!
as far as a realtionship goes - my head would be telling me not to get involved just in case something bad did come out of it. however if i loved him then my heart may tell me otherwise!
my hubby has a wart on one of his fingers which is being treated at the moment - who knows how he got it. but i have been paranoid about ut and don't let him touch my bits with that hand until it is completely gone just in case - silly perhaps but that is just me!
as far as a realtionship goes - my head would be telling me not to get involved just in case something bad did come out of it. however if i loved him then my heart may tell me otherwise!
Sojourner
Well-known member
Quote:
| Originally Posted by LMD84
my hubby has a wart on one of his fingers which is being treated at the moment - who knows how he got it. but i have been paranoid about ut and don't let him touch my bits with that hand until it is completely gone just in case - silly perhaps but that is just me! |
Simply Elegant
Well-known member
It's hard to pass the 2 types but it can happen.
Dahlia_Rayn
Well-known member
^^Also, if the visible wart goes away they can still carry the virus.
