Do you think a guy and a girl can just be friends?

MaskedBeauty

Well-known member
I'm like you, I have more guy friends than girl friends. I think that guys and girls can be friends but I do think that any guy will still have some type of attraction to a girl friend some time. That doesn't always necessarily mean that they "want your body" though. And as for the sexual comment that guy made...thats all guys. Especially college guys. lol. They all seem to throw in sexual comments time to time, even if they just barely met you. Maybe they think it makes them look cool???
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I have a guy friend that i'm very close with but I don't like him and would never be in a relationship with him. And he tells me a LOT that he wants to be with me and he'd be perfect for me and blah blah and even went as far as to ask if him and his gf broke up if I would go out with him. I'll admit I do get a bit irritated sometimes because he knows I would never be more than just friends with him but hey I guess thats just guys.
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Anywayyyy.. Hope this helps!
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chocolategoddes

Well-known member
Trust me, it's possible, but I guess it's different for me because I'm pretty much "a guy with tits" according to my firends.
You just need to establish that you're not interested in being anything other than friends. You might have to actually tell them this upfront; it can be a subtle hint or a flat out "I like hanging out with you, but remeber this isn't a date."
It's key not to even talk about relationship related stuff, even if you're giving him advice on other girls.
Try not to hang out one-on-one with guys, and if you do, it should be as casual as possible.
And guys are going to make sexual jokes no matter what. They can't help it and usually don't actually mean what they say... it just sorta comes out.

I personally try to prevent my guy friends from "liking" me, but if they say shit like they think I'm hot or whatever, it weirds me out but I just joke about it and try to change the subject. Haha.
 

Shanti

Well-known member
Agreed with chocolategoddes' advice. I do that too- try to "change the subject" as soon as it gets weird. XD

I personally have "difficulty" with male friends, because 95% of the time, no exaggeration, a "confession" will come out on either end, usually the guy's. It's really annoying having to reject a guy friend, but it's not out of the ordinary either. And it sucks falling for a guy friend too >_< so I don't keep close friendships with guys anymore.
It's possible to be purely platonic all right, but if they're not gay/you're not lesbian, chances are a lot slimmer, I think.
Or maybe it's just my bad luck? lol.
 

Chikky

Well-known member
I think it's very possible.

I had mostly guy friends growing up (I'm sooo much more comfortable with guys), and we hung out in groups or one on one, whatever! Only once did one of them have a 'crush' on me, but he got over that and we stayed friends throughout (no awkwardness) when he got his girlfriend, who turned into his wife! Other than that, I've had no other guy friend make a move or even seem like he wanted to.

Hmm.

I kinda wonder what that means about me, hehe.
 

Pink_minx

Well-known member
Yeah a guy and a girl can be friends...my friend who is in a relationship is good friends with this other guy. I found it weird at first because she went out with him with out her bf and he went out with her with out his gf. But they werent doing anything. They were talking about random things like what any friends would talk about. I guess it depends on the person. My bf says he finds it weird to talk to other girls because he has me. The only girls he hangs out with or talk to are his guy friends or family members' gfs. I guess I am the same way but it is possible for a man and a woman to be just friends.
 

Almond_Eyed

Well-known member
The majority of my friends are guys. Me and my boyfriend were just talking about it while watching Top Model today. He said "Man, girls are CRAZY!" and I replied with "I know, that's why most of my friends are guys!" We laughed
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<3 A
 

RedRibbon

Well-known member
Most of my mates are guys and one of my bestest mates in the whole wide world is a guy so I think it's totally possible. I find that sometimes it's easier to talk to a guy about stuff than it is to a girl, plus guys don't judge you when ask questions about sex..like some girls can judge you straight off the bat but I find guys take the piss a bit but then give you the answer you're looking for.

I find it's easier to be friends with guys because girls en masse can be bitchy and it's sometimes hard to infiltrate the group but seeing as guys are simple
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, they usually have no ulterior motives.
 

wittynickname

Active member
Men and women can be friends. But it's hard for hetero men and women to be close friends. After a reaching a critical level, there's always the desire to hump each other. Hopefully I don't sound too flippant, but it's true from experience. And even if there is strictly no humping, there is always some sexual tension. It makes for great sitcom material, but it's not great for the friendships themselves.

After people settle into relationships, I guess it would be easier to have opposite-sex friendships. But then the significant others may feel resentment or jealousy, and it's hard to have closer friendships once you're in a relationship.
 
Soo much YES! Most of my friends are guys...if you just understand that it's never gonna "go there" in any sexual way then it's so easy to have a opposite sex friendship. I love my homies :p
 

kaliraksha

Well-known member
I think it's possible. I make guy friends easier than girl friends. I tend to like their protective nature and they are not usually as easily offended or sensitive. I think it's a lot like the choice to not cheat on someone. You can have the opportunity and temptation constantly brought up, but it's your choice to cross a line. I see it being very easy to date any of my guy friends, after all why would I stay close friends with guys who I didn't think were amazing in their own right.
 

sweetbabyblue

Well-known member
general friends, yes. Close friends..from my experience no.
I tried very very hard to accept my bf's 'friendship' with a girl at work, but it became too much.
I did not want to appear jealous and I initially got along with the girl very well. But after awhile (over a year) I did start to feel uncomfortable when she would text him up to 20 times a day, call him at 10:30pm and meet up with him for a catchup after work (they work at a restaurant) and then be talking till 2am.
What bothered me the MOST was that she was well aware that I was not comfortable with their closeness and continued to contact my bf more than ever. Whenever my bf said 'SBB is worried that I haven't come home yet' when I texted him at 1:30, she just goes 'oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to cause you guys to fight!' but then she would still do it..It was like she KNEW what she was doing, but chose to ignore it and then pretend to be sorry/unknowing later. I never spoke to her about it because I thought it would be rude, and my bf would not be happy if I did. At the end of the day it's their friendship and I shouldn't interfere.
I spoke to him about how uncomfortable I was, and he just shrugged it off, saying 'she's like my little sister, that's all'.
One time I went out with the two of them, thinking, sure I'll try to get to know her better, give her a chance. But I am naturally a more quiet person, and not very chatty. It's certainly not like she made some great attempt to talk to me either. Later I find out she complained to my bf 'SBB hates me!'. I NEVER said such a thing, nor was I rude to her. My bf told me that I was rude by ignoring her. ?!? I was never anything short of polite to that girl, yes I do not radiate warmth, but I am never rude. I felt uncomfortable with their friendship and wary of her, but even at that point, I did not hate her.
After that, I find out she keeps messaging things like 'ohh I wanna watch this tv show, but it's too scary, I can't watch it alone!' 'I'd watch it with you, but I don't think my gf would like it' 'yea, I always knew your gf was crazy. she's going to try and kill me because she hates me so much!'..there are much more of these type of messages
Yes, I found out about those messages because after feeling uncomfortable for a month and eventually having a large fight with the bf, I broke a big relationship rule and looked at the phone. Months have passed and my heart still breaks when I think about it. There is no trust left, who would've thought after 6 years?

So no. Some friendships are just too close and if you have a partner, don't let them get hurt.
 

bosskitty

Member
I grew up as a massive tom boy.All my friends are boys really girls frankly scare me. My best friend is a boy and we've been friends for years and neither of us would ever go there. It would just be weird haha
I don't think that all male and female friendships are genuine though I think it just depends on the people involved.
 

Piarpreet

Well-known member
agree
general friends, yes. Close friends..from my experience no.
I tried very very hard to accept my bf's 'friendship' with a girl at work, but it became too much.
I did not want to appear jealous and I initially got along with the girl very well. But after awhile (over a year) I did start to feel uncomfortable when she would text him up to 20 times a day, call him at 10:30pm and meet up with him for a catchup after work (they work at a restaurant) and then be talking till 2am.
What bothered me the MOST was that she was well aware that I was not comfortable with their closeness and continued to contact my bf more than ever. Whenever my bf said 'SBB is worried that I haven't come home yet' when I texted him at 1:30, she just goes 'oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to cause you guys to fight!' but then she would still do it..It was like she KNEW what she was doing, but chose to ignore it and then pretend to be sorry/unknowing later. I never spoke to her about it because I thought it would be rude, and my bf would not be happy if I did. At the end of the day it's their friendship and I shouldn't interfere.
I spoke to him about how uncomfortable I was, and he just shrugged it off, saying 'she's like my little sister, that's all'.
One time I went out with the two of them, thinking, sure I'll try to get to know her better, give her a chance. But I am naturally a more quiet person, and not very chatty. It's certainly not like she made some great attempt to talk to me either. Later I find out she complained to my bf 'SBB hates me!'. I NEVER said such a thing, nor was I rude to her. My bf told me that I was rude by ignoring her. ?!? I was never anything short of polite to that girl, yes I do not radiate warmth, but I am never rude. I felt uncomfortable with their friendship and wary of her, but even at that point, I did not hate her.
After that, I find out she keeps messaging things like 'ohh I wanna watch this tv show, but it's too scary, I can't watch it alone!' 'I'd watch it with you, but I don't think my gf would like it' 'yea, I always knew your gf was crazy. she's going to try and kill me because she hates me so much!'..there are much more of these type of messages
Yes, I found out about those messages because after feeling uncomfortable for a month and eventually having a large fight with the bf, I broke a big relationship rule and looked at the phone. Months have passed and my heart still breaks when I think about it. There is no trust left, who would've thought after 6 years?

So no. Some friendships are just too close and if you have a partner, don't let them get hurt.
 

mayushka

Well-known member
I love having male friends, because they're just so different than us girls, and I need that in my life. But it's kind of tricky to balance it. I personally think guys are more prone to seeing female friends romantically/sexually and it can get messy sometimes.
 

NATlar

Well-known member
Some friendships between a boy and girl can lead in one of them falling for the other but I believe they can be just friends. I hate it when people automatically think that when a guy and girl hang out etc that they're together or developing a crush on one another.

Personally I get on more with males than females.
 

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