rape?

singinmys0ng · May 16, 2005

Alright, this is weird to post this on here..but all of you guys have great minds and seem to have a good voice. I have found nothing on the internet..anyways.

My friend Natalie has been raped about 3 times by this same guy at her school. I have NO idea what to do. I don't want to get into the middle of things but i know if i told her mom it would be for the better. But you know..thats none of my busneiss right?

Well today she called and was crying saying she was raped again by the same guy. I think ive convinced her to tell her mom by tonight when she gets home. but what happens if she doesnt? should i take matters into my own hands and do something about it? ilove this girl to death but i dont want her mad at me for whatever reason..but i know in the end she prob get over it..

what should i do??? besides cut the guys dick off..

foreveratorifan · May 16, 2005

I work and donate for Tori Amos' charity RAINN

the Rape Abuse Incest National Network

Have her call immediately the phone number to get help and speak with someone who can assist her!

it's 1-800-656-HOPE!!!!!

Please, tell her to call it and SHE must go report it...she should really go to the police station and if you can go with her that will be best....

Good LUCK

PnkCosmo · May 16, 2005

Great advice, torifan.

She definitely needs help right away. She might be mad at you for a bit; but will still love you in the end. Her safety is more important that worrying if she'll be mad at you or not.

martygreene · May 16, 2005

If you wish to speak to someone about this, privately, feel free to contact me off the forum.

martygreene0 (AIM)
martygreene @ gmail

I too suggest her calling an organization such as RAINN, or your local womens hospital, boystown national hotline, or even just the police.

Is this high school or university?

martygreene · May 16, 2005

For the benefit of us all, here are some helpful links on what to do in case of rape:

http://familydoctor.org/314.xml

http://www.rainn.org/whatshould.html

http://www.nsvrc.org/

http://www.malesurvivor.org/

http://www.mencanstoprape.org/

http://www.rapevictimadvocates.org/

Hotlines you can call:
http://www.rainn.org/centers/index.html

foreveratorifan · May 16, 2005

thanks marty!!

i'm always an advocate of RAINN and these other organizations!

singinmys0ng · May 16, 2005

thanks a lot for the great info everyone.

Quote:

Is this high school or university?

This is in high school. However, she was raped on the campus only 3 times. Today he broke into her house when no one was home and raped her.

thanks again for the msgs and links ..it's helping a lot!

mac_obsession · May 16, 2005

Quote:

Originally Posted by singinmys0ng
thanks a lot for the great info everyone.

Quote:

Is this high school or university?

This is in high school. However, she was raped on the campus only 3 times. Today he broke into her house when no one was home and raped her.

thanks again for the msgs and links ..it's helping a lot!

If he broke into her house, she needs to contact the police.
The act of rape itself is despicable..He needs to goto jail...or castrated or something. Make sure she does something about it, if she says shes scared ask her to do it for all the other girls out there he could hurt, sometimes its easier to fight for someone else rather than yourself.
good luck to both of you

martygreene · May 16, 2005

If this is occurring at school, the principal of the school needs to be notified, as well as the police. Other students are potentially in danger. Do you go to this school as well? If so, talk to your guidance counselor about this.

Not only do both she and the other students need protecting, but she needs to be treated both medically (if needed) and psychologically, beginning ASAP. As a rape survivor myself, I know how hard it is to tell someone. I waited too long, and now my rapists are still free men going about their lives. Something needs to be done now. I also waited too long before talking to someone who could help me through the emotional trauma. I'm still working through this today, almost ten years later.

Seek help as soon as possible.

nphernetton · May 16, 2005

Everyone who has replied is absolutely correct.
Your friend NEEDS to report this.

The boy(s) who's doing this needs to be punished and your friend will probably need to get some emotional help. All of the resources that were given are great places to do some research and/or seek help.

Reporting this will help save her from going through it agian, and possibly help stop this guy from doing this to anyone else.

As others have said, you and your friend have my full support and if you ever need an unbiased, neutral point of view or opinion, I'm here for you. Best of luck.

singinmys0ng · May 17, 2005

goodness, this is so hard...

Last night she went to the hostpital to a doctor who she has been to before about this stuff. So, this isn;t the first time. However, she did not tell her mom last night..leaving me trying to decide how to tell her mom OR try and get her to tell her mom herself. I've never met her mom before..don't even know her last name. But I have the house number and her mom's cell phone since Natalie called me from it last night from the hostpital. So..im gonna call her mom today. I know it might not be the best idea since its over the phone but its the only way i can. I know if i asked natalie where her house is..that would just be too obvious and she would prob. freak. Again i just wanna thank everyone who has replied to this thread. This is prob one of the most hardest things ive ever gone through and just can't imagine this happening to so many people around the world. It has got to stop.

Kayla

glittergoddess27 · May 17, 2005

Good luck sweetie,.. thoughts and prayers are with ya. This kind of situation is never easy,...

eponine · May 17, 2005

maybe you could call her mom and tell her to meet you at a coffee shop or something? it might be harder for her to hear that sort of thing over the phone...and also she would probably stand a better chance of believing you in person.
good luck, lady. you're doing the right thing.

Jillith · May 17, 2005

God, what an awful sitation. Bless your heart for being such a dear friend and doing your best to advocate for your friend. I really think you should speak to her mother. Am very glad to hear your friend has been to the hospital. Whether she reports the rape or not is up to her, but either way she needs to receive treatment. And I strongly feel that the break-in needs to be reported to police if not the rape. Please talk to your friend's mother. I know you're in a difficult sitution; just keep doing the best you can to support your friend. Telling her mom the truth will facilitate this. Tori and Marty have given you good advice and links to some excellent resources. Best wishes for you and your friend. She is lucky to have you.

martygreene · May 17, 2005

Is there a reason, other than the obvious trauma, that is preventing her from telling her family? religious views, moral views, ideals, negative home situation, etc.? You may want to be careful not to make a bad situation worse by telling her family if it is not a safe thing for her.

singinmys0ng · May 17, 2005

Yeah i thought about that too marty..

However, she just called me and her boyfriend and her are going to the police station 2morrow and he is going to help her tell her mom. I trust him with her and I am 100% that he will make her go to the police. Your probably wondering why hasnt he done this sooner? Well he has been out of town and is only coming back home late 2night and he just found all this out 2day.

singinmys0ng · May 18, 2005

AHHH!!!!!! I am so happy right now!!! Natalie just called and said that she didn;t go to scholl today and that her and her boyfriend went to the police and they arrested the guy TODAY!!!!! i am so freaking happy!!! they had enough evdince for everything!!!! ahhh..i am so fucking happy..thank you all SOOOOOOO much for all the info!

mrskloo · May 18, 2005

I can't believe I only read this now. I'm so happy there is a good ending to this.

You really are a great friend you know.

glittergoddess27 · May 18, 2005

Thank GOD! It is nice to know that she stood up for herself and that a baddie is off the streets!

GoldieLox · May 18, 2005

WoW you are a very honerable individual and i commend you for sticking by her side. that is a tuff thing to deal with. my sister was almost raped once by her best friends brother and it cause a lot of drama and it was a really bad situation and her ex best friend i should say even accused her of lying and they didnt have any proof so the guy is still out there. i am SO glad that they arrested this guy. I believe that we are the same age and i want to let you know that i look up to you for your honerable actions.

rape?

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member

Well-known member