Some people need a life...

[~LadyLocks~]

It really makes me laugh! ~Here's my rant~

Now, I know that Specktra is a public website and anything thing you post is being looked at. And I know that by posting your business here on Specktra gives people a reason to "talk" about what's going on but, when is it enough? People confide in Specktra to vent, rant, get advice, or just share their joy with others. That's one of the reason why I love Specktra so much. You have the freedom to say whatever your feeling even though people may agree or disagree, they still here your out. But where do you draw the line?

I've been active on Specktra for about a year now and have never had any problems. Everyone is really nice and respectful, something that's really hard to find on a public website, another reason why I love it here. I've always been open with my life cause I'm happy with where I'm at right now, plus I figure hey...I don't know any of you anyway so what's the harm? So I thought...

Well, I'm sad to say that I no longer feel safe here nor do I feel comfortable letting you all know what goes on in my life. You see...there's a "certain" someone here that's been spreading my business around like it's the thing to do and I don't appreciate it. Every post I've put here seems to get out and it's sad. I almost want to makeup stuff just to see what else they'll be saying and who they'll be telling. Now like I said before, it's partly my fault because I'm letting you in on my personal life which gives people a reason to talk but I had no idea to what extent. Now, the site I adore so much, a place where I felt safe, is no longer a safe place for me so I'm sad to say that I can no longer fill you guys in on the joys or hurdles that come my way in fear of having this person call people and say "guess what she's up to now".

It's just to bad that some people have nothing better to do than talk about my business, perhaps because they don't have a life of their own. What a shame...

I'll still be here but I have to watch myself, something I never thought I had to do here.

 

[Tash]

I honestly don't blame you at all. And the fact that someone would do something like that just shows their maturity level. <3

 

[sharyn]

Geez how sad and bitter do you have to be to find fun in such stupid ass actions like online backstabbing? Dont you have a life? Thats like the coward version of highschool backbiting - Go out and get laid if you're that bored, for god's sake. *rollseyes*

I am sorry this has happened to you, your signature is 100% right - if those people had any damn dignity or talent or joy in their life, they'd be spending time with more important things than talking about you behind your back - shrug it off you're better than that

 

[prinzessin784]

I'm sorry to hear that!

Some people just can't get enough satisfaction in their own lives that they have to make other people look bad to feel better about themselves, which really bothers me. I hope this person backs off!!

 

[MxAxC-_ATTACK]

I am also sorry to hear this. Unfortunately anything posted on the internet is pretty much a free for all. I think about stuff every time I post . I make sure I am verrrrry careful with each word.. I like to call these particular type of people "INTERNET CREEPS" People who find your personal thoughts, plans, etc.. on the internet.. and spread them about like its their business in the first place. These are the people who need to get off the computer , the computer they are using for being internet creeps and Go outside and find a life to live of their own. not someone else's.

 

[MsCuppyCakes]

Yeah, I agree it's really a shame that people are like that. People feel / believe they have the right to spread someone else's business and they don't. But I always look at that person and know they're not someone I can confide in or trust. I look forward to your EOTD's.

 

[ette]

Wow, that is absolutely awful! Very obnoxious...it's so high school.
I had similar problems. I used to post A LOT on MUA and people would tell me that anytime I posted an FOTD they would bash me on BeautyBash how hideous I was, etc. Also, if I posted makeup work I did, they would say I was lying, pathological liar, etc. because of my age. Yes, I am 16, but yes, I can work in the beauty industry. Not to boast but it is obviously because they are jealous that they cannot have a job doing that. It really really bugged me. I mean do people have anything better to do then bully people online?

 

[*Luna*]

Honestly... I think you should confront them. Maybe talking about things would get a lot more accomplished rather than continuing to do what you are posting about in the first place.

 

[Raerae]

Heh... I think everyone at some point learns how, "un-anon" the internet really is.

I learned the same lesson several years ago. I had blogs, live journals etc. And I posted pictures and all sorts of stuff. I thought it was great, until I realised people that I didn't want reading (aka everyone who knew me IRL) were reading about my private stuff.

For some reason the internet gives people a false sense of security when it comes to speaking about things that are very private and personal. You meet other people who have similar things in common, and it normalises the expierence.

Until people you didn't want knowing, figure it out ;p

Since then, I've personally removed all my photo's (granted i'm sure plenty of pictures of me a RCS'ed on perv's HDD's), and deleted all my journals. And when I do spill the beans about my private life, I try to eliminate all references to people I know, names, etc. So that while I can share, I dont have to worry as much about people putting 2+2 together.

 

[..kels*]

i'm sorry to hear that!

i can't stand people who thrive off of gossip/backstabbing. sorry, this isn't high school.

some people just don't know when to be mature & respectful. i've been feeling the same way lately though.. specktra is one of the best online communities to post in & the majority of members are absolute sweethearts, but it's easy to forget that it IS a public community & is by no means 100% "safe". i completely agree with Raerae.. it gives you that false sense of security & allows you to let your guard down.

 

[~LadyLocks~]

Thanks for all the support and understanding everyone. Hopefully that someone will get the hint and keep my name out of their mouth, we will see...

 

[~LadyLocks~]

Quote:

Originally Posted by *Luna* Honestly... I think you should confront them. Maybe talking about things would get a lot more accomplished rather than continuing to do what you are posting about in the first place.

What for? I have nothing to say to this person, they are not who I thought they were and I don't waste time on people who don't deserve it. And, it's not like their gonna admit to it anyway, it would be just a waste of time.

 

[kaliraksha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~LadyLocks~ What for? I have nothing to say to this person, they are not who I thought they were and I don't waste time on people who don't deserve it. And, it's not like their gonna admit to it anyway, it would be just a waste of time.

Sometimes it can make you feel better though- to know that the person is aware and they didn't just "get away with it". Closure?

I'm sorry this is happening to you, though, people closest to you have the ability to hurt you the most =(

 

[~LadyLocks~]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaliraksha to know that the person is aware and they didn't just "get away with it".

Thanks but believe me, after this, they are well aware! Let's just see if they grow up and get a life of their own and stop talking about mine!

 

[*Luna*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~LadyLocks~ What for? I have nothing to say to this person, they are not who I thought they were and I don't waste time on people who don't deserve it. And, it's not like their gonna admit to it anyway, it would be just a waste of time.

No but maybe what you *think* is going on... really isnt, or isnt how you percieve it... and that's fine. You can continue to be angry about something that isn't there or isn't what you think it is or you can settle it and maybe both people can move on. Everything going on in this situation is hear say and for you to want to ignore it and not settle it by confronting the person is silly. Like I said it's all hear say at this point. You don't know what the other person has to offer... it may be the REAL truth. It's funny that you say this person isn't who you thought they were because in all honesty you didn't really know them to begin with, and thats because I believe you never gave them a fair chance.

 

[swtginbug]

girl, i'm sorry this has happened to you. i've actually had this happen to me before to, on another site.. figuring it would be safe for me to rant about my daily life.. but it wasn't. people just talked their shit and let other people in on what i am doing and how i am doing. so i had to keep my other site private now to only restricted friends...

so yeah. it sucks. but don't let it get to you. you're right, people don't have lives and are just fu-kin' stupid. don't worry, they will get theirs. karma is a b-tch...

 

[Beauty Mark]

Well, I don't know what's really going on, but I'll say this:

1) You have to be careful about what you put online. I work hard at keeping myself anonymous on most boards, even though I know that I've somewhat left a trail.

2) Specktra isn't really the place to work out your issues and being passive-aggressive isn't helpful. I advise both of you to talk to each other in person or on the phone, as calmly as you can. There's no point in hashing it out on the boards.