bachelorette party?


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So I just got engaged last week! Yay!
Anyway, my fiance (it's so weird to say that, haha) and I have to pay for everything ourselves b/c our families don't have much money, so our wedding would have to be pretty small. I have a bunch of girlfriends I'd love to party with for my bachelorette party, but I know I wouldn't be able to invite ALL of them to the actual wedding.

So basically I'm asking...

Would it be totally lame and rude to invite them to the party, but not to the wedding? It would be like, "hey you can come party with me, but you can't come to the wedding, SORRY!"

Should I just invite the friends I know I'll invite to the wedding?

How do i invite some friends without offending other friends?

So stressful already and it's only been a week! haha.


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I dont think that would be rude. invite your closest friends to the wedding, and explain the situation to the others. If they are good friends, they should understand
good luck


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congrats on getting engaged! if i was invited to a bachelorette party, i would expect an invitation to the wedding too. just my opinion. but if they are your good friends, they should understand like what cantaffordmac said.


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Congrats on getting engaged.
You can invite whom ever you want to the bachelorette party; Your friends.
Explain that you are having a very small intimate wedding with immediate family only. They'll understand


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I think it's fine to have a big bachelorette party whilst keeping the wedding small. Just explain to your friends that circumstances mean you can only have a couple of your best friends at the actual wedding, but if you had it your way they'd all be there.


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congrats! yay for engagement!

I agree with kaexbabey that if i got invited to the bachelorette party i would think im invited to the wedding aswell, and if you dont make it clear for people it can turn out in the being frustrated, finding out from other people who were on the wedding actually. But yeah, i agree with CantAffordMac that if you make it clear in advance and they are good friends they will understand. Just dont tell them straight away you're planning to invite "only close people" cause even people you've met twice in your life seem to be hella offended when they realise you're not meaning them as close ones (always happend to me :/)

So explain it, say you're low on money, but still wanna party with them! Thats your wedding, your bachelorette party, so you can do whatever you want. I never understood why you have to invite all that random people to whу wedding instead of getting 10 closest friends and relatives.


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Congrats!!!!!!!!! I would think I was being invited to the wedding if I was being invited to the party. However, if you don't invite them to the party they will be pissed also. I would just sit everyone down in a big group, explain your situation, tell them you would love to have them come out with you, but you understand if they don't feel comfortable. Also, be sure to explain that it is simply a money situation. I also wouldn't invite people to the party who you aren't that close to. There's no point in even bringing them into the situation.


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Congrats on your engagement!

I always look at wedding dilemmas with the same attitude: It is your day, your decisions and your happiness. Others should just appreciate that.

Do what works for you guys and what makes you happy.


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It wouldn't be rude as long as they know its because you are having a small wedding and not because you dont like them. I'm sure they will still want to help you celebrate at your party!


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Hope your wedding goes is a pic of my cousins bachlorrette make0up i did that night......


She is now married and i posted some pics of it in the MY WEDDING PARTY thread.....


Well-known member
If I was invited to a friend's bachelorette party I would probably expect to be invited to the wedding. Depending on how understanding your friends are it won't be an issue, but the etiquette conscious could be offended. As others have said, it's your day so do whatever you want, but be warned that it could cause drama.

P.S. You should check out the Etiquette Hell website, it has a huge wedding section. Very funny and informative of the things that wouldn't occur to you as being offensive which might bother others.

Etiquette Hell