College Roomate

[doniad101]

Hey everyone,

I think this is the right place to put this but if not, I apologize!

Okay I have a slight dilemma and would like to know what you guys think I should do.

So I'm in college and this I'm living with my 3rd roomate. My first roomie I only had for 2 weeks, so I really didnt know her habits that well. My second roomie I lived with for a semester and it was pretty difficult seeing as she was sloppy (i was tripping over her clothes to leave! LOL) & attention seeking/over dramatic, and I didnt say much to her about it because I didnt want it to seem uncomfortable.

However now that I am on my third roomie & its only been a week, I find again that this new roomie is attention seeking & over dramatic, which can be pretty annoying when ur just trying to enjoy a movie and the person is just making random noises and being a PITA!

What I am asking is, since its only within the first week, although I told her i'm pretty easy going (she said she was too) should I tell her in a nice way that it annoys me when she does the over dramatic/attention seeking bid, and if so how would I say it? Or should I just keep my mouth shut like I did the semester before and resent the fact that I didnt say anything?

I know this may seem like a stupid question, but i just dont want a conflict or to feel uncomfortable with my roomie.

I hope you guys can help me, I'd really appreciate any suggestions.

TIA!!!

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

Since its only been a week, I'd give her some more time. Now I dont know her circumstances but maybe she's just going through a rough time right now? We all have that time in our lives where its just drama drama drama, whether we like it or not.

But if this does go on after a little while, I'd def say something to her. I'm not sure how I'd it though, maybe ask her to just be a little quite nicely?

 

[Beauty Mark]

What exactly does she do to seek attention? Does she have some kind of disorder that causes her behave like this (the random noise thing is why I ask)? If she's just telling you a bunch of "omigod, my life is the worst thing ever!" stories, being disinterested but polite usually shuts up people like that.

 

[ImMACnificent]

I would be careful how you say 'attention seeking' behaviors. I mean that sounds pretty mean.

If you wanna talk to her about her habits in the dorm/apartment, that's different but when you start talking attention seeking, that seems more of a personal attack.

I would just be cautious at how you go about it.

I know if someone came up to me and said I was attention seeking, I would immediately get defensive and then whatever constructive criticism they would have I wouldn't listen anymore because I'd just be PISSED that they called me attention seeking.

If you want her to listen, be as polite and constructive as possible! No matter how difficult it is!

 

[Makeupaddict88]

I'd give her maybe a little more time, 2 weeks tops. If she is still doing the over dramatic, drama queen skit, I would nicely tell her that some of the things she does aggrevates you and that you guys need to come to a decision on how to handle it. If you handle it nicely and not make her seem like she's crazy or annoying, you may find that she will pipe down or at least chill when she's around you. If she doesn't respect what you were saying, find yourself a new roomie.

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ImMACnificent I would be careful how you say 'attention seeking' behaviors. I mean that sounds pretty mean. If you wanna talk to her about her habits in the dorm/apartment, that's different but when you start talking attention seeking, that seems more of a personal attack. I would just be cautious at how you go about it. I know if someone came up to me and said I was attention seeking, I would immediately get defensive and then whatever constructive criticism they would have I wouldn't listen anymore because I'd just be PISSED that they called me attention seeking. If you want her to listen, be as polite and constructive as possible! No matter how difficult it is!

I'm wary of living with someone that I don't already know very well. Maybe its just me being paranoid, but that person could be capable of anything. Plus you don't truly know how they are like.

I think I would get defensive too if I was called an attention seeker. So yes you have to be careful on how you approach her and how you word things.

 

[ImMACnificent]

Quote:

Originally Posted by X4biddenxLustX I'm wary of living with someone that I don't already know very well. Maybe its just me being paranoid, but that person could be capable of anything. Plus you don't truly know how they are like. I think I would get defensive too if I was called an attention seeker. So yes you have to be careful on how you approach her and how you word things.

Exactly. What if she goes freakin nuts and starts messing with your shit?!
Bitches be CRAZY!
jk jk

But seriously, Id be careful!

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ImMACnificent Exactly. What if she goes freakin nuts and starts messing with your shit?! Bitches be CRAZY! jk jk But seriously, Id be careful!

Or even does the single white female thing! Yikes! But on a serious note, there are some crazies in this world.

 

[doniad101]

X4biddenxLustX: Thanks very much for your suggestions! :-D She isnt going through anything right now as she has been very open to me about her personal life, but I will keep that in mind in future refrences. In addition, I totally agree, I am a bit weary of who I live with but since I cant do anything a bout it (random pick), I have no other choice but to try and find another roomie, but who know how that will turn out, LOL!

Beauty Mark: From what she has told me, she hasnt mentioned any disorders and like i stated above, she's been pretty open, and hasnt mentioned anything, but she's more of the "omgosh, blah blah blah" annoying thing which bugs me when I'm trying to watch a movie! LOL! Thanks for your suggestions, I really appreciate them!!

ImMACnificent: Thanks for your advice!!! :-D I will not tell someone they have "attention seeking behavior", because I wouldnt want anyone to tell me that if I had that problem. The only way I could put it in words on here was "attention seeking behavior", LOL! I will definately confront her if it continues and in very nice manner, I'd probably say something like, if i'm a bit busy like watching a movie, do you mind just being a bit quieter or something like that...if thats okay, lol.

Makeupaddict88: I agree, I will give her sometime because it wouldnt be fair on either of our parts. If she cant change after a month and half at most, I will most definately post up for a new roomie. Too bad I couldnt pick and choose my roomie at this college since I transfered and its random pick :-( LOL!

 

[X4biddenxLustX]

If that's the case, then I think maybe she is just another miss dramatic sadly? Finding a good roommate is tough. It's not even a good idea to have close friends as roommates either. If you think about how close you will be constantly and how bickering can easily start up. My friend had asked if I wanted to share an apartment with her and like 4 other people! I kindly told her no. I could already see the problems that would cause not just for me but everyone.

 

[ImMACnificent]

Good luck hun! let us know how it goes

 

[Makeupaddict88]

Ya good luck. That sucks you couldn't pick your own roomie!! I think you would of been alot better off awhile ago if you just picked your own lol.

 

[caffn8me]

I really don't know what to suggest beyond giving your roommate a bit more time to settle in and if that doesn't work, you're going to have to say something. If she's only just started at the college she might be lonely which is why she's seeking your attention.

Having a roommate at college seems very strange to this Brit, especially someone who is a complete stranger. When I was at college, everyone had to live in college accommodation for the first year and everyone got their own room - there was certainly no sharing. It meant there weren't problems like you're having. The academic pressure was quite high and I'm not aware of any of the colleges at my university that did anything differently. Many are now giving students accommodation for two or three years.

I'm sorry to hear what you're going through and I hope you are able to get it sorted soon. Good luck!