Completely insulted by a stranger...

[~Crystal~]

I don't know if this fits into 'Deep Thoughts'... it probably doesn't. But I feel like i really need to let it out..
I suppose it's not a major incident or anything. Maybe you guys will laugh at it because it's so trivial. I don't know...
Anyway. This afternoon, I was in the city (seeing as how I'm in Australia, Sydney CBD is about as busy as it gets), and was waiting for my boyfriend outside a japanese food store, munching on a dumpling that I'd bought from there and minding my own business.
A man with a small child and his wife came up to me and asked me for directions to the Opera House- which I gave gladly. They thanked me, and I was more than happy to help out. In short, everything was fine.

Then a few minutes later, another man came up to me and went 'can I ask you a question?'
Thinking that he merely needed directions or something of the sort, just like the previous person, I nodded.

The absolute perverted JERK!! He LOOKED at me with that stupid GRIN like it was funny or something, glanced down again, then went: 'Those aren't real, are they?'

I honestly have never been more insulted in my life!! I was so angry that I didn't know what to say... A complete STRANGER coming up to me on the streets, and asking me a personal question like that?!?!

I wanted to slap him to wipe that goddamn GRIN off his stupid smirking face!! But I was so angry that I could barely speak!!! All i managed was an outraged 'Excuse me?!?!' and walked away from him.

Well I thought that was the end of THAT, but he FOLLOWED me!! He had the NERVE to follow after me and say 'oh c'mon they can't be. I mean, just LOOK at you!!'

ARRGGHHHHH.... i swear i felt like screaming!! >.< freaking MORON!! and he was STILL grinning/smirking!!!! Stupid perverted male. Who the hell asks that kind of thing of complete strangers anyway?! or even of someone you know?!?!

I turned around and walked the other way.

I was so distressed by the whole incident... I've never had anything like that happen to me before. I was just speechless, angry and seriously offended!!! By the time my boyfriend arrived (I called him and asked him to hurry up because there were strange men harrassing me), I was (yes... it's stupid.. but I really couldn't help it) literally in tears because i was so ANGRY and insulted.

I guess this is a very sensitive topic for me. Yes I am very aware that a large majority of females out there would like bigger busts. Yes I am very very... curvy. I don't know another word for it.. like that. And yes, worst of all, I am asian, which makes it even MORE abnormal.
I am 20 years old, weigh 48kg, stand about 5'3 tall, about a size 26 in canadian and 22-24 in US sizes, and I am an E-cup.

I detest my figure. Honestly. Some of my girlfriends don't believe me when I say that... I guess that's fair enough from their point of view. I guess they just can't understand. For the past week, I've been having both upper and lower back aches because of the sheer weight of it all. My mother has the same problem, so it is genetic. She has to see a physio 2-3 times a week because of how bad it is. i HATE it. For me, (and i really hope that no one gets offended by this), but anyone who PAYS to have lumps of goo stuck into their boobs is in short, quite delusional in thinking that it's a GOOD thing. It really isn't. Take it from someone who has to deal with this naturally, for every day of her life.

The worst part was... when my boyfriend asked me what that guy had said to me, I couldn't tell him. I don't know why- but I felt so ASHAMED of myself, like I was dirty or like I had done something to warrant what he had said. I was so angry at him... but i felt so ashamed that I couldn't say. I know that I shouldn't- I don't even dress to reveal my figure or anything. I refuse to wear sleeveless tops or tank tops, even in the blazing Aussie summer heat simply because they count as 'revealing too much' in my book. I was just wearing loose brown pants and a pink quite high cut t-shirt...

*sigh* I'm sorry for ranting on like this... if anyone has even bothered to read all that. I guess it's kind of silly and insignificant compared to what everyone else posts about, but I really needed to get that off my chest.

 

[lara]

Is this on the corner of Pitt & Market? There have been a few absolute scumbags around there lately; they're usually drifters coming down from the Museum Stn shelter or tourists who are waiting for their shuttles outside of the Hilton, get bored standing around and decide to hassle the local girls. I'm a hippy nipped-waist 10DD/E; trust me, I cop the breast-obsessed perverts there all the time, unfortunately.
Should this happen again, there are always police at the Market St end of the mall as they have a small shopfront near there. Go stand near them or report harrassment to them. I recently had a vile Japanese businessman follow me from the monorail station to the mall, grabbing at my breasts and then twisting my arm and calling me a slutty Australian bitch when I told him to hit the road. I nabbed one of the bike cops, told him about the perv and they took care of it right away.

You are absolutely not dirty and you didn't do anything to solicit that kind of attention. You should of told them that if he was so interested in big-busted girls, he can go pay money at the Cross like everyone else.

P.S if you're only a wee 48 kilos, no way are you a US22-24. Maybe a 2 or a 4 at the most - I'm 64kg and I'm a US6/8.

 

[~Crystal~]

Thank you

Your reply made me feel heaps better- it actually was on Pitt St- though I can't remember if it was Market St or not. It was right outside Asagao... so just across the street from Myer

I just couldn't believe the nerve of that guy!! What really got me was that stupid continuous grin and the way he just kept LOOKING at me >.<

Next time, I'll definately be telling someone about this! Though I really hope that there won't be a next time...

I don't know what I would've done if what had happened to you occured to me instead. I'm kind of quiet, and it definately isn't good to STAY quiet in a situation like that =\ I think i get the urge to slap them more than insult them back... which probably isn't so good either lol. The guy who came up to me was probably mid 20s and middle eastern.

When I was talking about the sizes (Yup I'm an aussie size 4-8... depends on the brand really lol) I got confused with the US ones. Last time I went over there, all the pant sizes were in big numbers! That's what i put down

 

[brandiisamonkey]

wow the nerve of some people! Im so sorry that such a complete jerk had to ruin your day! Those kinds of people arent worth worrying about...

 

[Raerae]

I'm always amazed at how men decide were sluts and tramps because we decline their rude comments about our bodies.

So if I'm a slut because I turn you down... If i said yes...?

I wish the english language had equally derogative words about the sexual habits of men. Since all the words that describe them are unfortunateley positive.

Not as if I can call them a pedophile since I'm 25 lol...

Stalker? lol

 

[Beauty Mark]

Some people are just assholes like that, but that guy was especially creepy. I would've found a police officer ASAP. I don't know what else to say... I've been groped on the street (bastard got away before I could do anything), have had lewd comments aimed at me, etc. It sucks, and there's not a lot you can do. You can, of course, fight back. Tell the guy to fuck off or something. It might make you feel better, but in my experience, nothing you say is going to enlighten them. At best, you can humiliate them.

 

[faifai]

If you're 5'3" and weigh 105 lbs (48 kg), there is no way you are a US size 24, as someone mentioned. You are probably a size 1 or 2, which would somewhat explain the guy's curiosity, though not justify it in any way whatsoever.

But you should never feel bad about your figure. It is not your fault some people are disgusting and insensitive, don't let them ruin your self-esteem or make you ashamed of who you are. Don't let them get you down--and if I was in that situation, I probably would have said something much worse in response before walking away. Some people are just nasty and have no understanding of boundaries. You don't deserve to be treated like an object, nobody does.

 

[Deirdre]

That was outrageous behavior, and totally crossed the line. Never be ashamed for other people's behaviour. I am so sorry you had to be subjected to that kind of thing.

If someone ever does that again, remember, you should never feel humiliated by their behaviour. Other's have already said that if it happens again, definitely tell the police. If there are no police around, make sure you're in a secure location, and be very loud about what is taking place. Those smutty little perverts scuttle off like cockroaches under a flashlight when we gals stand up to them. And if we don't act intimidated and shocked, so much the better: it ruins their day.

 

[lara]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Crystal~ Your reply made me feel heaps better- it actually was on Pitt St- though I can't remember if it was Market St or not. It was right outside Asagao... so just across the street from Myer

Yep, Pitt & Market. I work in the Dymocks building just over on George St, you can always come and hide in there.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Crystal~ The guy who came up to me was probably mid 20s and middle eastern.

Hoy. Not to further indulge a stereotype, but since moving to Sydney I've certainly noticed that certain types of 'men' hailing from the western suburbs are severely lacking in the respect for women department, Asian women especially. Hence why I moved to the inner city as soon as possible. Here everyone just ignores you instead of calling you a @%&%$.

 

[~Crystal~]

Thanks girls- I feel heaps better about the whole incident now, having read your replies and now I feel that I'd be more capable to deal with that sort of thing should it happen again

I guess I was just caught completely off guard by him- and I'd never had to deal with something like that before. I know some of my girlfriends have been in rather confronting situations (they live in the inner west too)... the worst case, where one guy followed my best friend through every carriage of the train she was on and umm... played with himself?

every time, in plain sight. THAT was bad. =\
She told me that all the other people would move to another carriage, but whenever she tried, he would follow her and continue to do so. It was really freaky... And it happened every time he saw her on the train. Lucky for me, I'm a North Shore girl- which is why I hadn't been exposed much to that sort of thing before i suppose.
So... I guess my situation really wasn't so bad, though it's certainly not something that should be tolerated

. I'll be sure to make sure that it ISN'T tolerated next time, and tell someone who can help me really quick so they'll learn their lesson!!

 

[spencoh]

Quote:

Originally Posted by faifai If you're 5'3" and weigh 105 lbs (48 kg), there is no way you are a US size 24, as someone mentioned. You are probably a size 1 or 2, which would somewhat explain the guy's curiosity, though not justify it in any way whatsoever. But you should never feel bad about your figure. It is not your fault some people are disgusting and insensitive, don't let them ruin your self-esteem or make you ashamed of who you are. Don't let them get you down--and if I was in that situation, I probably would have said something much worse in response before walking away. Some people are just nasty and have no understanding of boundaries. You don't deserve to be treated like an object, nobody does.

im 5'3'' and im about 110-113 and im a stick haha so yeah theres noooooooo way you are a size 24, i fit into size 0 pants, but then again i have the hips of a 9 yr old boy

 

[cookies]

Hey hun

Friggen hell, it seems like sydney is getting worse and worse!

I totally empathise with you and just want to give you a big hug! Sometimes it's just so wrong how you can feel bad when you shouldn't feel bad at all! And you don't know whether to walk away for safety's sake or let your inner bitch rip out at the guy

I'm flat as an iron board but even walking down George St at night makes me shudder at the number of creeps out there


ps. Lara, I used to work at accessorize qvb and just left equip qvb- we were pratically work neighbours!

 

[Raerae]

Quote:

Originally Posted by lara Hoy. Not to further indulge a stereotype, but since moving to Sydney I've certainly noticed that certain types of 'men' hailing from the western suburbs are severely lacking in the respect for women department, Asian women especially. Hence why I moved to the inner city as soon as possible. Here everyone just ignores you instead of calling you a @%&%$.

No wonder someone invented the burka

 

[Raerae]

Quote:

Originally Posted by spencoh im 5'3'' and im about 110-113 and im a stick haha so yeah theres noooooooo way you are a size 24, i fit into size 0 pants, but then again i have the hips of a 9 yr old boy

twigs unite

 

[Makeupluvr]

Quote:

Originally Posted by spencoh im 5'3'' and im about 110-113 and im a stick haha so yeah theres noooooooo way you are a size 24, i fit into size 0 pants, but then again i have the hips of a 9 yr old boy

Maybe she tried on some Guess jeans or something where the "size" is the waist measurement. Like 22-24 inch waist. HTH

And I am SO sorry to hear that this happened to you Crystal! I definitely think you are one lucky girl given your endowments, not to be vulgar or anything. But you should in NO WAY feel dirty. You didn't do ANYTHING wrong. WHAT a creepo! If it were me, I WOULD have screamed at him and made a scene, LOL. (At least that is what I would do in a perfect world

, well a perfect world that has creepos, you get what I mean, LOL. ) And lara! I CAN'T BELIEVE someone grabbed you! That is HORRIBLE! I am glad the police were near by and took care of it.

Keep your head up Crystal! And don't be afraid to cause a scene or get the police if anything like that happens again, even though for your sake I hope it doesn't!

*BIG HUGS*

 

[moonrevel]

If it makes you feel any better (I know it doesn't, but a little laugh never hurts, eh?), men saying and doing bizarre things in the general direction of boobs seems to have no direct relation to the size of said boobs. My best friend and I have small to average sized racks (in college we headed up the "Itty Bitty Titty Committee" in our dorm) and we still manage to get inappropriate comments from random men on the street. I'm not really sure what it is about boobs, but I think that as long as some guys (not all, but a strange minority) are even vaguely aware that there is some boobage attached to a woman, they are inspired to behave crudely. Don't ever feel that it's somehow your fault that they treat you as an object...that is their defect and it's a disgusting one that I will never understand (they're just boobs! Over half of the population has them!). If this should, god forbid, ever happen again, ask the pervert in question if he's thought of putting a sock in his pants, because obviously he needs to feel better about his own inadequacy.