Everyone thinks I'm crazy.

[xmrsvindieselx]

So I don't usually like to vent, but I feel like I could really use some opinions from you all here

. I lived in NY my whole life and my family moved to Florida. I ended up going with them, but coming back to NY because I hated it.Long story short, while in NY I got pregnant, and didn't find out until I was 9 weeks. I told the baby's father and he FREAKED on me telling me I need to get rid of it, I don't deserve a baby..etc. YES I'm young, but I chose to keep the baby. He told me he was coming after me, and going to kill me so I couldn't have his baby. I moved to FL to be with my family during this hard time, plus because I'm TERRIFIED of him ( I found out he has criminal charges against him for another girl being beat half to death). Everyone thinks I'm crazy because he had NO idea where I moved, and I don't want ANY ties ( child support etc). They think I should file for child support and get money from him, but I don't want him to have any ties to my baby!

Sorry its so long! It just upsets me everyday. I cry all the time because of him. I left so much in NY, a good job,some family, friends, I couldn't even take all of my stuff back with me.And I don't have extra cash to buy stuff all over again ( hopefully I will get stuff for my birthday..which is Dec 1st

but everything is being saved for the baby on the way!)


Thanks to anyone who has read this

 

[Cinci]

I don't think it's crazy, I think it's very admirable. Good for you for being so strong!

 

[MaskedBeauty]

Don't listen to people when they say you're "crazy". It's your choice and you're doing what you feel is best for you and your baby. Quite honestly I probably would have done the same thing if I found out the information you did. You could be able to get child support and full custody without him having to see the child if you end up needing the money to raise the child. You could use the charges on him in court to gain full custody and I doubt gaining child support would be a problem since it is his kid. Just an option if you change our mind in the future but I would have done the same thing. No worries.

 

[BeccalovesMAC]

Girl, my daughters dad was like that. He used to beat the shit out of me and stalked me when I left him. I had to skip town to protect myself and my daughter. I didnt go after him for support. I didnt want to deal with him and his crazy ass family. I met someone when she was 2 months and I have been with him for 10 years. She is 10 years old now and has a great life. It will be tough but you have to protect your baby.

 

[Strawberrymold]

Stay away from him honey! No amount is worth you or your child's safety. It's unfair that you don't have his love or support but I would stay as far away from him as you can. It doesn't sound like you can predict what this guy is gonna do so better safe then sorry, you are totally in your right mind to stay away from him!

I wish you and your little one to be the best of luck!

 

[xmrsvindieselx]

you all are amazing

I want to cry..because all of your kind words. I really feel like I'm doing the right thing.I never ever want him to know where I live.I'm so afraid he would really come after me, or even worse, my baby.The money situation is SO hard right now, especially since I've recently had a lot of money stolen from me, but its something I can work through, without his help. I just feel like if he pays, his logic is " well I'm helping out, so I can see the baby" and NO WAY. I'd rather work day and night ( which i will be soon. I'm freelancing one I build up my cosmetic collection again ..which may take a while since the money situation sucks LOL, getting a full time job, and working for the gov. census thing, plus going back to college in January..*phew*)

 

[BeccalovesMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by xmrsvindieselx you all are amazing I want to cry..because all of your kind words. I really feel like I'm doing the right thing.I never ever want him to know where I live.I'm so afraid he would really come after me, or even worse, my baby.The money situation is SO hard right now, especially since I've recently had a lot of money stolen from me, but its something I can work through, without his help. I just feel like if he pays, his logic is " well I'm helping out, so I can see the baby" and NO WAY. I'd rather work day and night ( which i will be soon. I'm freelancing one I build up my cosmetic collection again ..which may take a while since the money situation sucks LOL, getting a full time job, and working for the gov. census thing, plus going back to college in January..*phew*)

Good luck. U sound like you will be a fantastic parent. I am sure you will meet someone that will be a great father figure and will be there for the baby. My prayers are with you.

 

[MaskedBeauty]

I agree with Beccalovesmac. you are going to be a great parent.

good luck and keep your head up.

 

[xmrsvindieselx]

Thank you beccalovesmac and maskedbeauty! You both have really made my day!Its hard, but I feel like I can do it.Its just going to be a little crazy

LOL

Hope you both have a great week and holiday<3

 

[Cinci]

I agree with the above comments as well. I don't know how old you are but this is a very mature and smart decision that you've made. So many girls are more worried about getting "what they deserve" and being vindictive towards a man that has wronged them, that they act selfishly and lose sight of what really matters: yours and your baby's safety. Be proud of the decision that you are making, I am confident that you will do well without him.

 

[xmrsvindieselx]

delete

 

[BeccalovesMAC]

Quote:

Originally Posted by xmrsvindieselx delete

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

 

[Cinci]

You're welcome, and Happy Birthday! Good luck with your appointment today, I hope baby is co-operating!

 

[xmrsvindieselx]

thanks! i don't know what the HECK is wrong with my computer!! It jumbled up the thing I just wrote so I had to delete it!

Cinci. I'm 21. and it wasn't hard making the decision to break away from the baby's father and his craziness. Doing this all on my own is what is hard for me

 

[Cinci]

I have watched a few of my friends go through similar situations and the important thing to remember that while you are doing this without a "partner", you aren't doing it alone. You have your family and friends to help you and support you!

 

[Tashona Helena]

Happy Birthday, i'm a fellow December baby as well. I don't think you are crazy at all. I know a woman who just now went after ex after YEARS for past child support he was abusive/violent as well. If I were in your shoes I would've done the same thing. People who are calling you crazy just aren't as strong as you are. You seem like a beautiful person you don't deserve that bullshit, and neither does your child. I knew a friend who up and left everything to get away from a bad situation, and he had a hard time adjusting too because he left like you said a good job, friends, etc. He eventually went back, and if you feel strong enough you can go back too. Just surround yourself with good people and do what you can in FL. I know how it feels to be somewhere and things just don't seem like it's working (trust, I live in the country). Keep your head up, God bless hunny.

 

[xmrsvindieselx]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tashona Heléna Happy Birthday, i'm a fellow December baby as well. I don't think you are crazy at all. I know a woman who just now went after ex after YEARS for past child support he was abusive/violent as well. If I were in your shoes I would've done the same thing. People who are calling you crazy just aren't as strong as you are. You seem like a beautiful person you don't deserve that bullshit, and neither does your child. I knew a friend who up and left everything to get away from a bad situation, and he had a hard time adjusting too because he left like you said a good job, friends, etc. He eventually went back, and if you feel strong enough you can go back too. Just surround yourself with good people and do what you can in FL. I know how it feels to be somewhere and things just don't seem like it's working (trust, I live in the country). Keep your head up, God bless hunny.

Thank you so much. You all have made me realize I need to STOP caring so much about what everyone thinks. It's going to be hard, but I know I can do it.At least that's all I can tell myself and just take things day by day. You ladies share such beautiful words of wisdom by the way. I want to thank you all for this. I felt like I was falling apart, and now I can slowly put myself together again.

 

[MizzTropical]

You aren't crazy, your doing the right thing. Your choosing to raise ur baby away from danger. It's a sad situation, but if you choose to keep the baby, then you need to be responsible and do whats best for him/her.

You should be proud of urself. So many women cling to horrible men like that and don't leave. You were strong enough to leave at such a young age. I don't understand how anyone could call u crazy over not getting $$ from a dangerous man.

Don't listen to them.

 

[LMD84]

i agree with what everybody else has said. i think you have made the right choice and i respect you for wanting to do this own your own. it won't be easy but you have a good head on your shoulders and i am sure that thinsg will turn out for the better this way.

and happy birthday!

 

[gildedangel]

I agree with everyone, you did the right thing. Your safety and the safety of your baby is much more important than any money. I think that you will make a great mom, you have a good head on your shoulders and your baby is very lucky to have such a good mom. Happy Birthday!