help.

bnbs2x

New member
i don't know whats going on. i just broke up with a guy who was manipulative and bad for me. but i miss him, through all the shit he put me through he really loved me and taught me to love myself and i don't know if i miss him cause i'm lonely ( i'm at a place right now that i don't have any friends, i sit home alone all day doing nothing...) but i know i really love him i just couldn't put up with all our fighting and his personality.
i don't know if i should give him a second chance, i know i won't now but in the future i don't know if i should.
i guess i could give a little backround, we had been dating for almost 10 months. it was not nearly my first relationship, but he is deffinatley the only guy i ever loved, who loved me too. he could be really amazing thinking of cute nicknames, cheering me up and really listening and understanding my problems. but then sometimes he would just start playing these games with me like he would ask me whats wrong? out of no where, so i tell him i'm fine, and he persists until i start a fight over something stupid, when nothing was wrong in the first place. and he would always poke at my belly and pinch my fat and try to get a rise out of me by baby- talking me ( which i hate and it gets me angry which he knows) he would always do little things that get me really frustruated, becuase he thought i was cute when i was frustruated, but it just gets ridiculous.
and around his friends he would act like i was not good enough for them, looking for excuses to get people to laugh at me, which he and his friends act that way, but i'm notlike them and it hurts but he wouldn't stop.
speaking of his friends, they all decided it would be funny if this girl who has a crush on him, if she told him so, so she did adn instead of stopping it and telling her to back off he gives the phone to his cousin to "mess with her" like leading her on letting her think that my ex wanted her too. he idn't want to stop the girl cause it was a joke his friends were plaing and he didn't want to cramp their style.
he also had an ex who cheated on him, and he didn't trust me because of it.
towards the end he changed about that, buti don't know.
can someone help me?i don't have any friends and i really need some help
even through al that we had great times together, just being completley open and free. he was so loving and would try so hard to make me happy when he wasn't driving me crazy. i also had this problem with our sex life, like he would expect me to be a pornstar pretty much, but he wouldn't do anything in return for me, he wouldn't even make out or hold me during sex unless i asked him to right beforehand. what is up with that? is that weird? i had to beg him for affection and eating out and to touch me and grab me during sex.
i nearly broke up with him before and he made a lot of serious changes, so i'm wondering if since i did actualy breakup with him, he may really change everything, i know it will take time i just need some advice, i really have no one, i am considering going into group therapy to socialize. i just need someones opinion or help.i just don't know.
 

aimee

Well-known member
In my opinion its better if you and him are not together
but you definately have to socialize. If you dont have friends dont hide yourself...go out...join something...go to the gym or do whatever you like to keep your mind of him and meet new people. Believe me there are better guys out there and you will fall in Love again.
 

Beauty Mark

Well-known member
He sounds like he needs you more than you need him.

Trying to get you to talk about non-existent problems reminds me of those people with a hero complex, wanting to be a savior when there's nothing to be saved. Then making fun of you in front of his friends and playing around with that poor girl? Sounds like low self-esteem.

At worst, he sounds mentally abusive. At the least, he sounds like a manipulative jerk. Either way, do you want to be around someone like that? Do you really think you can't do better than some loser who gets his kicks from hurting others? I don't know what you look like or your personality, but I'm willing to bet you are. Make some friends somehow and forget this guy
 
Top