How do/did you Discipline your Toddlers ?

[SkylarV217]

I have a 2 and 1/2 year old and I can't seem to find the best form of discipline. It breaks his heart if i scold him, but sometimes its like he tries to push limits. He listens very well 95% of the time... it the other 5% that make me want to pull my hair out... So i was just wondering how you ladies discipline ?

 

[Shimmer]

Beat them sadistically about the head and neck with a broomstick.



Just kidding.


Consistency is the most important thing, and understanding his limits. If he's tired, it's unfair to scold him for being cranky, and it's probably best to take him home and let him sleep. If he's hungry, accommodate that.
Set the boundaries and keep them consistent and always the same.

Time outs, ignoring them (when they interrupt), and for my kids a few jumping jacks or pushups, generally works well.
I've been known to swat a tush as well, but I'd rather not do it.

 

[M.A.C. head.]

I'm pretty much in sync with Shimmer on this one.

Being consistent and firm with your decisions, learning what will hold his attention so that you can redirect when he's doing something he's not supposed to, knowing when he's being a brat or when there's really something wrong [tired, hungry, hurt, or just plain sad]. Staying level headed is most important, I know they work our nerves, but usually the vibes you give out are the ones you get back, so just try your best to keep your nerves.

I have a 1 and 1/2 year old daughter and she's learning the joys of "NO!", climbing on tables, throwing food LOL I notice that when I just dismiss the behavior or deal with it calmly, depending on what she's doing, it decreases.

Best of luck.

 

[TUPRNUT]

My husband and I have found that time-out works really well on our 2 1/2 year-old daughter. We started this just around her 2nd birthday and used the technique Supper Nanny uses on TV (don't laugh): We sit her down in her time-out spot; if she gets up we just put her back and say "it's time-out time". When her 2 minutes are up, we explain why she was in time-out and give hugs and kisses afterwards. She's done so well with this that sometimes I'll find her sitting in time out... I haven't put her there, so I can only imagine what she did to feel the need to discipline herself!

As the others have said, consistency is really important. This age is all about pushing-limits to see where the limits are. It's confusing if you discipline once and turn your back on it the next.

As far as tantrums, I hold her really tight in my arms, so that she can't hurt herself and she remembers that Mommy's in charge. Well, at least I like to think I'm in charge.

 

[benzito_714]

good post! i am dealing with this now-any and all suggestions are a big help. whenever i do discipline her, which is usually a slap on the hand or leg (she likes to get into things with those appendages) she cries and holds the appendage up and asks me to kiss it. how the hell am i supposed to be tough when she does that.

i'm a PUNK.

 

[Simply Elegant]

I'm not a parent but whenever my brother acted up, his toys were taken away and he had to have a time out for about 5 minutes and it didn't start until he could sit quietly. It worked most of the time.

 

[SkylarV217]

I love the Supper Nanny techniques. We use so many of them ... When he gets in trouble he has to sit in time out for 2 1/2 mins lol ... the he has to hug and kiss and say he's sorry and we tell him we love him. That seems to work pretty well.

We've started using a sticker chart too , so when he does something well like eating all his food , laying down easily at nap, picking up toys, and putting his clothes in the dirty clothes he gets a sticker when he gets 10 stickers ( he's just learned to count to ten) he gets a treat like we will all go to the park, or we'll go get ice cream or a watermelon, normally things we were planning to do anyway ... we just make a big deal out of it =D he has really loved this so i think it's more positive.

 

[M.A.C. head.]

I just remembered something else that I wanted to say.

It's SOOOO important to acknowledge bad AND good behavior. I'm not saying that you [OP] are guilty of this, but a lot parents are, and they don't even realize it. They are so focused on curbing bad behavior that they don't realize that their children need to be recognized for the GOOD things too! Children craaaaaaave attention, so when they are only given attention when they behave badly, they are inclined to misbehave as a means of getting attention. If you make sure to focus more so on the good things, they will be more likely to exhibit good behavior because they realize that: good behavior = attention.

 

[M.A.C. head.]

Quote:

Originally Posted by benzito_714 good post! i am dealing with this now-any and all suggestions are a big help. whenever i do discipline her, which is usually a slap on the hand or leg (she likes to get into things with those appendages) she cries and holds the appendage up and asks me to kiss it. how the hell am i supposed to be tough when she does that. i'm a PUNK.

OMG :'(

I'm a spanking-as-a-last-resort mom and I haaaaaaaaaaaate spanking my little girl. I really only do it if she's doing something that is extremely dangerous. At first, I would be so mad at myself because I would think "I'm hurting her because I don't want her to get hurt! That's so backwards" but what I realized is that sometimes that swat on the butt is the only thing that will make them realize "hey...she means business". When I have to spank I always explain why I did it and then I give her hugs and kisses and tell her "It's because I love you" and it is

 

[TISH1124]

I agree with all the ladies...My son has been on the Reward system since he was about 2 y/o
You have to be consistent..If they know you might eventually give in they will keep trying you. My son (6) is on the rewards system..He gets rewarded for good behavior by getting to play with his toys, watch movies, extra after dinner snacks, etc...When he makes "Bad decisions" (as he calls it) his rewards are taken away from him...No tv, No toys...He gets to only have education learning time for that entire day..depending on how bad he has been, he may get several days of education only time. He also has to make that bad day up as well...He has to have a full good day before he gets his rewards back. It works because man he hates just sitting in his room with nothing but books, crayons and paper. When he has good days we make such a big promotion over it..He feels like King for the day...So Daddy and I build his head up to massive size for those days and he loves every sec of the doting..It's really sickening how we carry on about good days ...But what can you do...
Not often but I do have to swat his lil rear every now and again..But this method only hurts me because it lasts about 1 minute and he is back to mischief in about an hour.
Taking away his goodies/rewards cuts to the bone with him. So this is our best discipline method.

 

[SkylarV217]

We've had to take all of my 2 year olds books away .... and its so hard on all of us. he is in a "big boy bed" ie a toddler bed which is fisher price boat, the "bow" of which is about a foot high, and his book shelf is right against the end of his bed. He knows and has know he is not allowed to get out of bed unless Mommy or Daddy gets him out. He has gotten out of bed once without us since Jan when he got his new bed. So he's good with that rule. But now that he is a little older/bigger he has realized that he can stand on the tip of his bed and get EVERYTHING off of his 4ft high 2 1/2 ft wide bookshelf ...

So there have been several mornings that we have come in and had 60-70 books in his bed with him and some toys... ( I leave a backpack with toys and books in it by his bed that he is allowed to play with when he wakes up). I hate cleaning them up every morning, but i'm more afraid of him climbing on the bookshelf and his bed and it tipping over on him or him falling. So after a couple of nights of "don't get anything off of the bookshelf" I finally told him that if he got any of the books off the shelf we would have to put them away for a while.

Now we have no story books to look at except his school books and I'm not sure when I should give them back to him, We took them out on Wednesday.