I need to get physical

[farra712]

Sorry for the corny-ness of that title, but that is what it comes down to.

I needed to make this journal because I feel like it will keep me more motivated and accountable than others I have (lj, etc.) I know that I will be on specktra pretty much every day, so it will be easier for me to stop by the ole journal and record things. I will go ahead now with some background info (for you if you are interested, if not then skip it. It is also to help me remember why I am where I am now):

I am about 5'5"-5'6" and I currently weigh 163.8 and wear a size 10 in most things. I am pretty evenly proportioned, but I would like those proportions to go down! I have tried a lot of things, but never have lost a significant amount of weight doing anything. I have however, lost a significant amount of inches (however, a swapping of fat for muscle will sometimes make the scale stubborn even though the measuring tape smiles at me). I am going back to doing the inch loss thing which is T-tapp. I have used it before without changing my eating habits very much and saw great results. I know it will be hard to not worry about the scale but I will be checking my body fat weekly and recording it here even if it makes you throw and I throw up. I will also take measurements which I may or may not record here as I have another notebook that I will keep these in until I am comfortable. Maybe I will just post my inch loss in numbers and not the actual measurements....I recently did weight watchers for about a month and did not do very well. I found it difficult to stick to the program as I have some binging issues which I am trying to address. I want to take it one step at a time..starting with getting back to my baby, T-tapp.

Anyway, I have some factors that make this very important, but also very difficult at times. First, I got engaged so I would like to look awesome for my wedding, though we have not set a definite date, I have at least a year. Second, I live with a mother who has an eating disorder and is constantly concerned with what I am eating (and pretty much everything I do). She makes it very hard for me to be healthy as she is constantly pushing her ideas about eating on me. I am working on moving out ASAP so that this problem will diminish. Also, as mentioned before, I have a problem with binging. Sometimes these are huge binges and sometimes they are not so huge. I have always liked to eat alone and sometimes I feel like a zombie when I am binging and then feel disgusting afterwards. I believe this is because my mother has made me feel ashamed about eating in front of people. I am admitting this here so that I can work on conquering it.

As far as the plan goes: I am working on substituting good things for the old bad things I used to eat. I think trying to just eat less and eat healthier in conjunction with my t-tapping is going to be my first step. After I have gotten into the habit with exercise, I will probably start some some sort of way of eating that is even better for me. I look forward to also reading others' journals so I can gain ideas and insight just like I do from all of your talented FOTD's!

Edited: Thought I would post a picture here of what I probably look most like right now. I avoid full body pictures usually, but this one was for prom last year and I wear the same size now as I did then, and weigh about the same. This can be my before picture which means I will one day need an after!

 

[kaliraksha]

I totally feel you, honey! I'm around your weight and height and looking awesome in a designer gowns is one of my goals. I'm not even so much concerned with losing weight... but just shaping up... I act like I'm 50.. I don't go outside much, not very physical... etc. I know a few 50+ women that are probably healthier more active than I am. I'm with you every step of the way... if you ever need some encouragement or more private advice then feel free to PM me =)

 

[farra712]

I can't deal with my mom and her watching everything I do that has anything to do with food. I wish I could hide and never have to see her. I can't wait until I can move. Other than that, today was pretty good diet/fitness-wise. I ate the following:

Flatbread Pizza (made with whole grain flatbread, turkey pepperoni, low cal pizza sauce, and reduced fat shredded cheese and some spices)

2 grilled chicken strips (each about the size of a finger...pretty small little things)

1 bowl sugar free oatmeal

1 Baked potato (small) w/light sour cream, light butter, reduced fat cheese, and 1/3 less fat bacon bits. (not the healthiest way to enjoy a baked potato but better than full fat everything and it is was I was craving)

That's all so far, but I am planning on having a bowl of soup and maybe a light popsicle. I don't think I want to limit my calories right away...just focus on better choices. I also did a T-tapp workout, so that helped me feel better about eating the baked potato. I hope I can do well tomorrow even though I have to get up early and will probably have to eat one of my meals at the mall. I am poor right now so let's hope not.

 

[kaliraksha]

What is this T-tapp workout? Yeah, I'm all about healthier options. If you like asian food make a brown rice stir fry with chicken and lots of veggies. I add low sodium soy, lime juice and a hint of honey. I use just a little bit of brown rice for a filler and wrap them in crisp lettuce leaves.

 

[farra712]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaliraksha What is this T-tapp workout? Yeah, I'm all about healthier options. If you like asian food make a brown rice stir fry with chicken and lots of veggies. I add low sodium soy, lime juice and a hint of honey. I use just a little bit of brown rice for a filler and wrap them in crisp lettuce leaves.

That recipe sounds awesome! T-tapp is a workout that you do without weights or any equipment. You work 5 or more muscle groups at once and you use your own muscle for resistance so you never outgrow it because your muscles will get stronger and then you will have more resistance! It is not your regular workout and it is reccommended that you don't do any other workouts for 30 days after starting it because it may make your results slower. Check out the website and all the amazing before and afters! That is what hooked me! And then I lost 10 and 3/4 inches in a month doing it (and then the hurricane came and I got out of the habit of doing it). But the website is t-tapp.com.

 

[farra712]

Today went pretty well. Hopefully, not limiting myself other than making healthier choices will work long term and get me in the habit of eating better. I also feel less tempted cause I know that I can eat until i am full and whenever I get hungry as long as I make it as healthy as possible and workout!

Today I ate:
B- Whole Wheat English Muffin w/ all natural peanut butter and 1/4 tsp honey
S- Pita chips and Hummus
L/D - Organic Burrito w/ red sauce
S - skinny cow ice cream sandwich

I think I may have a little more snackage since I just worked out and need to keep my blood sugar balanced. I like to think about how much cuter my face will be when it is slimmer. Makeup will look so much hotter! I work tomorrow, too, so hopefully it will be easy to not over-indulge since I won't have a chance to!

 

[farra712]

Another decent day. Definitely not perfect, but decent. I had:

B: Bowl of Kashi Go Lean crunch w/strawberries and skim milk
L: Whole wheat Pasta with Organic tomato sauce
S: Baked Pita Chips and cup of skim milk
D: Black Beans w/reduced fat cheese, green onions, and spices and (unfortunately) one handful of fritos.
S: Cantaloupe
Also a good bit of water throughout the day....but not enough

So, the fritos weren't great, but I am glad I had just a handful of them and not a bag full. I can't wait to have more of that cantaloupe tomorrow. It is damn good! I need to be eating more vegetables and probably less breads/grains, but I don't like many vegetables except for carrots, green beans, corn, and (very rarely) brocolli. I guess I can pull it off if I have to. I need to get in more water, too. I didn't work out, but I felt kinda weak and wobbly today for some reason so I didn't think I would do well at it. I don't know what's up with me. I need to get some sleep, though, for sure.

 

[kaliraksha]

hehe skinny cow ice cream is the sh#! I nee to go buy some =) Keep us posted!

 

[farra712]

I didn't do so great yesterday. Not as bad as I probably would have done in the past, but not so good. I had fries twice (once with chili and cheese) and a burger. Also I had a poptart which are the least nutritional things in the world! Well, today is a new day and I am going to eat better , because it makes me feel better. I think I have been sorta depressed lately and it isn't making working out easier. I haven't worked out in like 2 or 3 days, but I am really going to make it a point to do that today. I also am going to try to drink more water!!!!!!! And I really love my pita chips and hummus, but I feel like I need to cut back because they are still cooked in oil (although it is a healthy oil and they contain good for me stuff). I guess I will work on the water and exercise first. I wish I had more money so I could buy a couple T-tapp tapes, but I can just do what I can until then I suppose. Oh well. I am off to get a quick exercise before a shower!

 

[kaliraksha]

Yay, I think the important thing is to just not give up. A setback is never a reason to give up... my boyfriend is a yoyo dieter/excerciser and I think that lifestyle is horrible... he goes into bouts of eating/doing whatever he wants and when he gains extra weight he works out and is on a strict diet... and that's just awful to me and probably not healthy. For me, good food and being active is a lifestyle change... so you can't beat yourself up for a bad day... otherwise you are setting goals of perfection for the rest of your life which is not realistic.

 

[farra712]

I have to start posting here more. I also have to get to a place in life where I am not so stressed. I currently have two jobs and I just interviewed for a third which will probably be full time. So I put in my notice at one, and I am actually waiting to find out from MAC if I am getting a perm. position. I can't accept or deny either job until I find out who is offering me what...it's all really stressful and confusing. So, because I suck at stress, I have been eating really well all day, only to eat something bad for me at night. It has been a full-on binge, though, so I am proud of myself for that. The day before yesterday, I planned on getting back into an exercise routine by moving my room around to fit my treadmill and getting a new dvd player that works. Instead, I woke up to a phone call that my fiance's father was in ICU at the hospital for what they think was a stroke. So I ate nothing at all until 4 o'clock, then ate Chik-fil-A and then ate a healthy dinner (at least). Pretty much same thing yesterday. Then today, I ate healthy until my friend and I went to the movies, where we split a large popcorn and root beer. I usually don't even drink carbonated drinks at all, but for some reason I do at the movies. (Probably because you can get twice as much soda for the price of a bottled water.) I have GOT to stay on track as best as I can and continue to improve. I just have to. I wish I could get into any kind of routine...like a work routine...then I could figure out my time a little better. I guess it will happen soon....hopefully.

 

[farra712]

I have been doing much better lately, so I am happy for that. I am not seeing a budge from the scale, but I know it isn't what is important. I just wish it would budge anyway. I also think something might be wrong with my scale as it tells me the exact same number to the decimal no matter when or how I weigh myself. usually my weight fluctuates a great deal.

Anyway, I have been doing my T-tapp full workout every other day and trying to get some kind of little cardio in on my days off from that, and also eating healthier. My fiance's family had a cookout the other day and I was so proud of myself when I went for the grilled chicken (peeled the skin off), salad (picked croutons out, and went for italian dressing), and only 1 Tbl of mac and cheese. Also, I went to a wedding and only ate fruit and veggies and pita chips. These are huge victories for me since I am the worst at willpower. I can tell a difference in my body (just a tad) but I am really wishing I could get the scale down to 145 at least. I guess if my body keeps getting smaller, eventually the weight will have nowhere to hide, and come off! That's all for the updatage.

 

[farra712]

I lost 2 pounds! It isn't much, but I wasn't really expecting to lose much actual weight at all, since the T-tapp workout I do builds lean muscle in such a short time. However, after reading about the Mastering Leptin way of eating, I decided to try it yesterday. Well, I did well all morning, but I hated it by the night, because I have low blood sugar and was starving and feeling faint. I ended up eating Japanese food for dinner which made me more hungry, and I went and got an ice cream after that. Calorie-wise i probably still didn't do too bad, but I haven't had fast food ice cream in a long time, and I didn't feel great after eating it. I think what I was doing was working just fine, and I really think it is something I can do forever. It is not hard to eat healthy if you know that when you do occasionally have something that is not so great for you it won't mess up the whole thing. I just joined a 6-week challenge on the T-tapp website's forum, so I think that will help to keep me accountable. I may start posting my food later to see if a pro (*nudges Wattage*) has any suggestions for me!