If myspace was real life!!


Well-known member
some of you may have already seen this, but i had to share for those who havnt. its so true and so funny!!

~If MySpace was REAL LIFE~

19 year old boys wouldnt own shirts, and 19 year old girls would not own pants.

If you're obesely fat, people would only see you from the shoulders up / pictures of you from shoulders below cut or really tiny strange angles from high up, looking down on you.

Your attraction to someone would be based on their favorite clothing label, their favorite band, their collection of louis vuitton items and of course a long survey.

All straight females would still wanna dildo fuck the shit out of Angelina Jolie and all straight males drive import muscle cars and show around their abs.

Your drivers license would have hearts and/or stars around your name and you could pick whatever color you want.

The phrase Yo, your hawt, yo holla at me back some time for a drink" would attract the opposite sex.

Bands with 3 song demos could book stadium tours based on the number of "fans" they have.

Really hot girls would occasionally meet 2 or 3 other girls who used to be 50 year old truck drivers, but now look exactly like them, and they would all sit and compliment each other all night on how beautiful and sexy they are.

Lesbian women would not allow anyone with a penis within 50 yards of them, not even to deliver a pizza !

It would be perfectly acceptable to blurt out any random, filthy, perverse, sexual thought at any random woman/man you thought was "hawt" as a first greeting.

It would be no more unusual to see a man walking around displaying his erect, naked penis than it would be to see random women running around in a g-string w/nothing covering their fake breasts but their hands.

Everyone would make $100,000 a year or higher.

There would be a lot of youthful looking 40 year olds and a lot of teen-age looking 20-somethings because they all use old photos and say they're recent .

Blogs would be required reading and any random thought in your head would be shared with everyone.

Everywhere you would walk, an image of Angelina Jolie would be behind you , haunting you .

You'd suddenly have a friend named Tom giving you bad news constantly or invites you to hawaiian pornstar meetings .

It wouldn't be odd to have Brad Pitt or Paris Hilton and foreign footballstars in your circle of friends .

Most happlily married husbands and long-term relationship boyfriends say they're single and ask for romantic dates and some action whenever their woman is out of town .

Hello Kitty would be a real person.

Tila Tequila would know everyone in the whole world.

When it was time for bed you would say you're "Undergoing Maintenance."

You would have to paint your walls using Thomas' Myspace Editor codes in your apartment.

Stewie from Family Guy would be your best friend.

Your girlfriend doesn't mind if 50%of the females you know are strippers.

Your boyfriend puts glitter stickers on your front door to show his affection.

In your circle of friends you would hang out with people at all the Scottsdale bars and they would own their own clothing lines.

You would struggle over the time it takes someone you like to crack your top 8.

When someone said something funny, you'd actually roll around on the floor and laugh your fucking ass off

Conversations would sound like this "How are you,Babe?" Sent. "Good how are you,Handsome?" Replied. "I miss you Angel" Sent. "Awww,Sweetie" Replied and so on .

During a long conversation youd have to say "Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: all right, well call me later "

Every couple of days you would threaten all your friends to take their information out of your cell phone and delete them, since they haven't called you in, like, four days.

At least once a week you would tell them you're conducting a test of "true" friends and if they don't respond back, you'd no longer be friends.

Every third girl you meet would be married to either Vin Diesel, Johnny Depp, or the drummer from blink 182 and acting as smart as Jessica Simpson.

More than half the women you'd meet would be high class "models" or famous "pornstars" and more then half the men amateur photographers.

You would have constant bad luck from all the chain letters you got in your mailbox everyday(of which there'd be at least 50).

Every guy that thinks he's hot knows a chick named Forbidden or Krystal


Well-known member
hahaha. the Vin Diesel one makes me happy

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