I'm gonna blow!

Beauty Mark

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicksWifey
So I told him I was going to my parents house for the day because his family is coming over and I know how "upset" his sister gets when she can't use our computer. Yes I pay for our cable TV/internet BTW. He got all pissed about why did I need to leave, etc. I asked him why did they constantly need to come over here on our only day off together. His response? "Well what else would we do, sit around on our ass?!" Yeah, that would be nice, ANYTHING would be nice without your fucking freeloading family always over here! Jesus Christ, he does not understand a fucking word I'm trying to say. And I even tried to be civil but nope, he wants to push my buttons cause he knows I get nasty when my buttons get pushed, regardless of who's pushing them.

I will be thankful that I can go back to my parents house for a few days after my surgery.


I think you really need to have a talk with him and a good look at your life. It seems that he really isn't inviting any kind of conversation for you, and you're getting way less out of it than you're putting it
 

MzzRach

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by ohnna-lee

It's your home and you have everyright to be alone with your honey.

If it was me, I would leave my dildo on the keyboard... yes, I am that bad
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!


Oh no you didn't!!
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And Tish, honey, you let me know what time your show airs, OK?
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Mizz Coco Lust

Well-known member
can u setup a certain time when she can use the computer once a week maybe? that will take a lil heat off ur problems and it wont shut ur mans family completely out.
 

FiestyFemme

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beauty Mark
Blood is sometimes thicker than anything and you marry the person, you marry the family. Cliches, but true.

You're going to have to decide that if this is how you want to live the rest of your life.


ITA.

I know you love him, but you really do need to think about living this way for the rest of your life if nothing changes. I love my BF, but if his family was as annoying and disrespectful, I definitely could not do that for the rest of my life. I'm a nice person, but I can only take so much, and I'm sure it's the same way for you.

I hope Nick decides to listen to you. It's about you two now... not you and his dad, brother, sister, etc. I guess he hasn't realized that yet.
 

blindpassion

Well-known member
Shes 15 and she acts that way!? When I was 15 I was attending dinners with my parents and their friends and fitting in just fine. Theres no excuse for that kind of behavior, how was she raised? I mean seriously eh?

I'm so sorry you're going through that.
I think its important for Nick to listen to you about this, it's YOUR family now too. It's your house. And whether you or he likes it or not, his family is your family too and it will be from now on.
I haven't been in that situation so its hard for me to comment but I really wish you the best, and better times are coming <3
 

NicksWifey

Well-known member
I went to my parents house for a few hours this afternoon. I vented to them about his family and they are definitely on my side. I have talked to other people about this situation too, friends & co-workers and they all agree that there's no reason for them to come over so damned much.

I was gone for about 3 hours, plenty of time for the entire family to come over, do their shit and leave. I even stopped by the grocery store on the way home and picked up a few things and when I pulled in parking lot of the complex, I could see both his mom's car and brother's car. It really pissed me off. I could feel my blood boiling but I just took a few deep breaths, smoked a cigarette and rolled my ass in there, high & mighty with my grocery bags. His family left about 10 minutes later.

Later this evening, Nick and I sat down and really talked it through and he apologized for how much is family has been coming over lately. He also told me that he told all of them that next Sunday, he doesn't want anyone coming over so that was great news. At least I know when I come back from my surgery that I can have peace & quiet this weekend here @ home.
 

TISH1124

Well-known member
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That is so great...see he did listen...He will make the changes in his own time...Good luck with the surgery!! Prayers and Hugs
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coachkitten

Well-known member
Well I am glad that Nick seems to be coming to his senses. Hopefully this can stick and he can create boundaries with his family. Sending you lots of love and prayers for your surgery.
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sharkbytes

Well-known member
It may be his family, but you do have a right to say something about what goes on in your own home. Just my advice, I'd tell whoever is causing the drama straight to their face that you don't appreciate being taken advantage of and ordered around in your house where you pay the bills. It's great that your fiance said something to them, but unfortunately most times when that happens, the family will start to paint you as the "difficult" one and may wind up not respecting you at all. You know what I mean? Like they'll run to him and say something like, "Oh, well SHE'S home, guess that means no internet..." or whatever. Whereas if you say something up front, they can't pretend they didn't know it bothered you. I'm not saying this is the case at all, but it is something to be mindful of in the future.
 

Simply Elegant

Well-known member
I think the visits need to be planned ahead of time so you know when to expect them since they are his family but I do agree that he should be able to go over there as a planned visit to see his family, not to just use things in their house like they seem to want to do at your house. It's like they're using him for his and your stuff instead of wanting to be around him. I think that if you can compromise with him it would really help. If you want the evening or afternoon with him, then they can choose the leftover time, putting you first sometimes instead of his family always getting their way if they put up enough of a fuss.

I think it's awful how they behave but trying to talk to them rationally, with the way they've been described, seems like it would go in one ear and out the other.

I think Nick has all the power over them instead of you, because they know that he cares for them and they have a close bond and I think that even if he says exactly what you want him to it would sound better coming from him than you because of the closeness.
 

kaexbabey

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by NicksWifey
I got super pissed yesterday morning because I found a text message on Nick's phone from his sister on Friday saying, "Can we come over Sunday? Or will the computer be occupied?" Like this is some kind of fucking dew drop inn/internet cafe where she has the right to be on our computer!
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UGH that would make me so mad! seriously, why don't they just go to internet cafes? that reminds me of a time when my husband's sister who owed us money said to us while i was pregnant w/ my second baby, "do you guys NEEEED a double stroller?" uh, YEAH and it doesn't matter what we do w/ the money you owe cuz it's OURS.

maybe you could say something like that to your husband or his parents if you're comfortable being straight forward with them. you can tell them that it's your stuff, you guys pay for it,and it's not fair that you have to share it with them when it's inconvenient for you.

your husband needs to realize that even though they're his family, YOU come first now. you're his wife, and your guyses stuff should be yours only and not to share with his family. it would be fine if they came over to really visit and then go use the stuff after a while of chatting, but it's so rude that they come over JUST to go online and stuff.
 

florabundance

Well-known member
aw that worked out so good, im happy for you! now no more STRESS
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cos u have urself to be thinking about right now
and yeah, nobody wants to be told their family sucks but EVERYBODY sees it, believe me, probably more than the outsider does.
 

Krasevayadancer

Well-known member
You are definitely at your breaking point and I feel like it will only continue. Maybe it is time to re-evaluate. Is this how its going to be always? If so, and I hate to say this- maybe the relationship is not meant to last. (I hope for your sake it is)

The best you can do is talk to him calmly, explain how you feel calmly. He needs to understand that you really can't handle his family's drama
 

NutMeg

Well-known member
You know, you're always posting about how you have problems with Nick, but it always seems like at some point the two of you sit down and work something out. And I think its unrealistic to say that a relationship is good or bad based on things like this, because they just come up. Its life. I think a way better judge is how you handle these things, and the two of you always seem to.
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Anyway, good luck on your surgery and keep us posted.
 

user79

Well-known member
I'd put a password on the computer and not let his freeloading sister anywhere near it. If she demands to know it, just say no, firmly.
 

rbella

Well-known member
Britt-This sucks so bad I can't even stand it. It is so rough when you don't get along with your in-laws. I would say tread lightly on the words you use with him. The worst thing to do would be to possibly insult him or his blood.

My best advice is to sit down, explain to him how the intrusion of his family makes you feel and see if you can work out some type of schedule instead. Or, if you want to be really snide, just have your family come over at the same time and start using up his shit.

Love and hugs!!!!!!
 

nunu

Well-known member
I am so sorry that you are going through all of this, it's really unfair to you because you are going through a lot of things. I wish you well girly, be good to yourself and come back to us. We are going to miss you.

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