euphrosyne_rose
Well-known member
One of my favorite things about SATC... "I couldn't help but wonder..."
I'm having some trouble falling asleep and somehow started thinking about this thing Dear Prudence said in her advice column the other day. I read it every so often just b/c I like reading people's issues and what she has to say. A few people had been writing in complaining about their significant other and she basically said, "Why do we always gravitate towards the people who make us miserable?" Amen to that!
I of course then started thinking about all my past relationships and how for about a year and a half now, I've been single. I'm almost 31 and while I do sometimes miss the perks of having a b/f and someone in my life, right now I DON'T miss the being miserable half the time and putting up with someone's bullshit. Then again, I could just be jaded and cynical since so far I've had really nothing but negative experiences when it comes to relationships and maybe I've just haven't found Mr. Right. It seemed like I always ended up doing that girl thing we've all been guilty of at least once where we tell ourselves, "Oh, just be patient! Things will get better soon, you just have to give it some time!" and then we've been patient til we're Deep Truth blue in the face (like the MAC reference?
) and months have gone by with no change and we're even more miserable. What makes us hang on and hang on to the person who it's just not happenin' with?
But then that made me start thinking about the Mr. Right/soulmate issue and I started to wonder if there is a "perfect" person for someone or is it just the person you deal with and who deals with you the best? It seems to me more and more that the more you read and the more you talk with people, one person seems to always get tired of the other. It happens. But for some lucky people it lasts forever. Some people can't imagine being happy with just one person for the rest of their lives and other people can't imagine being happy with anyone else but the one they're with.
Even now it seems like us ladies still feel the pressure to get married, have kids, have a house, etc and all before a certain period in our lives. Some feel the "clock" ticking and others don't. As of right now, my clock isn't ticking the least bit. Could it be because I work at a school where my business is dealing with children all day? I love all of them and love working there but at the end of the day, I don't feel like I want a child of my own right now. I guess in a way I'm still selfish with my time and enjoy not having to deal with doctor appointments and baby sitters and terrible twos and all that. The remarks I get sometimes as a 30 year old single, childless female are a bit much sometimes. "You aren't married?" or "Oh, we'll have to find you a nice guy" really grate my nerves sometimes. Not too long ago, our 5th grade class at school completed a DARE program where they had a "graduation" and being the school secretary, I see all of the kids during the day at some point or another and like to see them accomplish and complete things. I went to the graduation which was held in the school cafeteria and one of the lunch ladies who works in the cafeteria looked at me and said, "Why are you here? You aren't married and you don't have any kids!" and I was sort of taken aback. WTF? I can't come see these kids complete something that is important to them just b/c none of them are mine and I'm not married???
If you're a single or attached lady here on Specktra, how do you feel about "finding the one" or what is your stance on marriage and the biological clock and all the stuff that goes with it?? I know I'm not alone but I'd love to hear some other points of view!
I'm having some trouble falling asleep and somehow started thinking about this thing Dear Prudence said in her advice column the other day. I read it every so often just b/c I like reading people's issues and what she has to say. A few people had been writing in complaining about their significant other and she basically said, "Why do we always gravitate towards the people who make us miserable?" Amen to that!
I of course then started thinking about all my past relationships and how for about a year and a half now, I've been single. I'm almost 31 and while I do sometimes miss the perks of having a b/f and someone in my life, right now I DON'T miss the being miserable half the time and putting up with someone's bullshit. Then again, I could just be jaded and cynical since so far I've had really nothing but negative experiences when it comes to relationships and maybe I've just haven't found Mr. Right. It seemed like I always ended up doing that girl thing we've all been guilty of at least once where we tell ourselves, "Oh, just be patient! Things will get better soon, you just have to give it some time!" and then we've been patient til we're Deep Truth blue in the face (like the MAC reference?
But then that made me start thinking about the Mr. Right/soulmate issue and I started to wonder if there is a "perfect" person for someone or is it just the person you deal with and who deals with you the best? It seems to me more and more that the more you read and the more you talk with people, one person seems to always get tired of the other. It happens. But for some lucky people it lasts forever. Some people can't imagine being happy with just one person for the rest of their lives and other people can't imagine being happy with anyone else but the one they're with.
Even now it seems like us ladies still feel the pressure to get married, have kids, have a house, etc and all before a certain period in our lives. Some feel the "clock" ticking and others don't. As of right now, my clock isn't ticking the least bit. Could it be because I work at a school where my business is dealing with children all day? I love all of them and love working there but at the end of the day, I don't feel like I want a child of my own right now. I guess in a way I'm still selfish with my time and enjoy not having to deal with doctor appointments and baby sitters and terrible twos and all that. The remarks I get sometimes as a 30 year old single, childless female are a bit much sometimes. "You aren't married?" or "Oh, we'll have to find you a nice guy" really grate my nerves sometimes. Not too long ago, our 5th grade class at school completed a DARE program where they had a "graduation" and being the school secretary, I see all of the kids during the day at some point or another and like to see them accomplish and complete things. I went to the graduation which was held in the school cafeteria and one of the lunch ladies who works in the cafeteria looked at me and said, "Why are you here? You aren't married and you don't have any kids!" and I was sort of taken aback. WTF? I can't come see these kids complete something that is important to them just b/c none of them are mine and I'm not married???
If you're a single or attached lady here on Specktra, how do you feel about "finding the one" or what is your stance on marriage and the biological clock and all the stuff that goes with it?? I know I'm not alone but I'd love to hear some other points of view!