miscarriage any advice?

[Girl about town]

Hey folks had a hard few days, i found out i was pregnant last friday and estimated i must be about 5 weeks, i was going away all week so hadn't seen my doc yet but had a positive pregnancy test one of the digital ones, my fiance and i were over the moon and went off on our week long holiday, all through the week i had brown discharge like the start of a period then last night i had fresh red blood and long stringy brown clots (sorry too much information) i went to my Gp today and she felt my stomach and did a preg test and it came back negative

.... i was so shocked i went home and took a further digital test and it said not pregnant. I had all the pregnancy symptoms and now they have all disappeared. My doc says i have had an early miscarriage. I am absolutley devastated!!! I am also confused that my hormone levels have dropped so quickly.
Anyway guess i am just looking for some kind words or for someone to share their experiences with me .

 

[Lauren1981]

i had an issue last year with a chemical pregnancy where it just never attached to my uterus. when it came out it was the same way except mine was bright red (almost orange) for 4 days and then all of these clots which scared the sh*t out of me because i've never seen so many like that. i had gone to the bathroom at one point and could feel them just coming out one after another (i was at work when this happened) and by the time i got to the doctor they said i wasn't.
from what i was told, when it happens so soon into it that can be the cause of it happening so fast (hormones dropping)
i don't know if that would be true for you too because our (females in general) bodies can act so strange but maybe that helps.
on another note, i hope you are okay

 

[Girl about town]

im totally in shock one minute we were planning for a new addition to the family next its all over like a bad dream, it must be a chemical pregnancy , im still having huge clots coming away and not sure how long this will go on for!!! i,ve to go back to my doctor after the weekend to see what the state of affairs is but i pretty much know the baby is gone!!!i feel like my heart will break!

 

[joey444]

Same thing happened to me with my first pregnancy. Found out I was pregnant, over the moon and then three weeks later while I was sleeping I got horrible cramps for like a minute and when I woke up, I had the brown discharge. This was on a Saturday so I had to wait until Monday to go to the doctor and sure enough, I was going through a miscarriage. I was devastated, my hormones were going haywire and I was so sad. Luckily, my husband was a great support and we were able to think about it positively and move on. It made us stronger and made us realize how bad we wanted a child. About a year later, Jazmine, our oldest daughter was born, healthy and strong after a beautiful and completely healthy pregnancy.

My advice, stay positive and the best way to think about it is that it was a blessing in disguise as early miscarriages is the body's way of recognizing that there was something wrong with the embryo and it discards it. I always thought of it like Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory when Varuca Salt was a "bad egg." I know it's difficult to think like that at the very beginning but trust me, it gets easier and also easier to accept.
Best of luck and we're here for you.
XOXO

 

[Lauren1981]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Girl about town im totally in shock one minute we were planning for a new addition to the family next its all over like a bad dream, it must be a chemical pregnancy , im still having huge clots coming away and not sure how long this will go on for!!! i,ve to go back to my doctor after the weekend to see what the state of affairs is but i pretty much know the baby is gone!!!i feel like my heart will break!

i am really sorry this happened to you. it's a very emotional situation. in my case, i wasn't even planning it. me and my "person" just had a "the night the condom broke" situation on our hands. but even tho it wasn't planned, it didn't make it any less emotional. i cried for a few days straight but eventually i got better and so will you.
just go back to your doctor to make sure everything is okay with you. make sure you have your grieving time, don't just try to get over it. and when you feel better try for it again.
you and your fiancee will be blessed with your addition and everything will be fine

get better!!!

 

[TISH1124]

I have no advice...But I would like to send you big hugs and say I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[Girl about town]

Thanks ofr all your lovely words!!! it really means so much to me.I have a 5 year old son and had no problems at all with that pregnancy so i think i am so shocked that this has happened i thought it would be the same this time,
Thanks again guys xxx

 

[Makeuplovingal]

I am so sorry for your loss! Many hugs! I had a MC in November 2007 at 12 weeks and it was very hard for me to deal with as I had already seen the heartbeat and seen the baby moving and everything on ultrasound. I had to have a D&C procedure as my body would not miscarry naturally. Anyway, my doc said it would take around 2 weeks for all the HCG to leave my body and I was 12 weeks along, so at 5 weeks it probably would not take long at all for the HCG to leave your body. If you are miscarrying, it probably is starting to drop before you start bleeding.

Exactly 1 year after my MC to the date, I had my beautiful daughter! You just have to take the time and heal...I think everyone deals with a loss in different ways...for me, I wanted to try again as soon as my doc would let me!

Again, I am very sorry for your loss and feel free to PM if you want to talk or anything!

 

[BEA2LS]

I am so sorry for your loss!

 

[Lauren1981]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Makeuplovingal I am so sorry for your loss! Many hugs! I had a MC in November 2007 at 12 weeks and it was very hard for me to deal with as I had already seen the heartbeat and seen the baby moving and everything on ultrasound. I had to have a D&C procedure as my body would not miscarry naturally. Anyway, my doc said it would take around 2 weeks for all the HCG to leave my body and I was 12 weeks along, so at 5 weeks it probably would not take long at all for the HCG to leave your body. If you are miscarrying, it probably is starting to drop before you start bleeding. Exactly 1 year after my MC to the date, I had my beautiful daughter! You just have to take the time and heal...I think everyone deals with a loss in different ways...for me, I wanted to try again as soon as my doc would let me! Again, I am very sorry for your loss and feel free to PM if you want to talk or anything!

CONGRATS ON HAVING YOUR DAUGHTER!!!
my heart goes out to any woman that's gone through this. whether it's planned or not, it's never easy but time heals

 

[pdtb050606]

First of all I would like to say I am so sorry for what you are going through. I myself am going through almost the same thing right now. I know the emotions are like a roller coaster ride, and I can't say there is a right or wrong way to handle things-it's a horrible thing to have to deal with. My husband & I found out and we too were completely overjoyed, and then a week later we were told that it was an ectopic pregnancy and I would need to take a shot to clear it out of my system. I also had the brown discharge but my hcg levels were going up but just not at a steady rate. So I had the shot last Thurs, and now my levels are dropping at a "good" rate. I haven't had any of the other things happen such as clotting or spotting. We weren't trying for a baby so I keep trying to think that this was just something to show us how bad we wanted one without even knowing it. Just like Joey ^ said try and think of this as your body's way of not allowing you to go through an unhealthy pregnancy. I am trying to be positive but I realize it is just my way of coping b/c actually I am a wreck on the inside, so I TOTALLY get it. Please feel free to PM me for any reason at all. Again I am so sorry you have to go through this.

 

[Girl about town]

Quote:

Originally Posted by pdtb050606 First of all I would like to say I am so sorry for what you are going through. I myself am going through almost the same thing right now. I know the emotions are like a roller coaster ride, and I can't say there is a right or wrong way to handle things-it's a horrible thing to have to deal with. My husband & I found out and we too were completely overjoyed, and then a week later we were told that it was an ectopic pregnancy and I would need to take a shot to clear it out of my system. I also had the brown discharge but my hcg levels were going up but just not at a steady rate. So I had the shot last Thurs, and now my levels are dropping at a "good" rate. I haven't had any of the other things happen such as clotting or spotting. We weren't trying for a baby so I keep trying to think that this was just something to show us how bad we wanted one without even knowing it. Just like Joey ^ said try and think of this as your body's way of not allowing you to go through an unhealthy pregnancy. I am trying to be positive but I realize it is just my way of coping b/c actually I am a wreck on the inside, so I TOTALLY get it. Please feel free to PM me for any reason at all. Again I am so sorry you have to go through this.

Thank you so much for replying, i totally get how you feel, one minute i am totally rational and know its for the best, and the next its like i,ve lost so much, its a really hollow feeling! its comforting to me that other people have been through the same thing!! xxx

 

[Girl about town]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Makeuplovingal I am so sorry for your loss! Many hugs! I had a MC in November 2007 at 12 weeks and it was very hard for me to deal with as I had already seen the heartbeat and seen the baby moving and everything on ultrasound. I had to have a D&C procedure as my body would not miscarry naturally. Anyway, my doc said it would take around 2 weeks for all the HCG to leave my body and I was 12 weeks along, so at 5 weeks it probably would not take long at all for the HCG to leave your body. If you are miscarrying, it probably is starting to drop before you start bleeding. Exactly 1 year after my MC to the date, I had my beautiful daughter! You just have to take the time and heal...I think everyone deals with a loss in different ways...for me, I wanted to try again as soon as my doc would let me! Again, I am very sorry for your loss and feel free to PM if you want to talk or anything!

Thanks for sharing with me, its really comforting to me!! just going to take it easy all weekend then start afresh on monday, have booked a week off work to spend time with my fiance and reflect xxx

 

[pdtb050606]

I will keep you in my thoughts

 

[nursee81]

I know many people who have had MC and its a very difficult time. There's no right or wrong way to deal with it. You will get pass it lots of hugs.

 

[pumpkincat210]

My first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. I was devastated. I went to the bathroom, basically the same story as you.. went to the e.r. in the middle of the night. I was only 6 weeks along, but had known for 3. so they put a catheter in and filled my bladder with fluid so they could do an ultrasound. The tech new immediately that there was no heartbeat but said nothing. I knew by the look on her face though. I ended up having to get a d & c to remove the rest. I was very sad, i felt hopeless and unhealthy. However, 10% of first pregnancies end in miscarriage. It does get easier with time and as your hormones get back to normal you will feel less depressed. Don't blame yourself, it is just natural selection and it happens alot. If you are trying to get pregnant wait about 4 months before trying again and start taking prenatal vitamins now. If you aren't planning on getting pregnant use 2 forms of birth control, definitely a condom and birth control pills.
Get lots of rest cuddle up and watch a good movie, do your makeup, get your mind off of it. I promise you will feel better.

 

[MACLovin]

I've never been through this experience, but I just wanted to say I'm very sorry for your loss, and I wish you the best with any future pregnancies.

 

[makeba]

i had a similar experience so i know how you feel. i was close to maybe 3month and even looked pregnant but i kept bleeding and then one day it was heavy and i began to clot. i went to the emergency room and had a vaginal ultrasound and nothing was there. i was totally floored and wondered how could this be! but let me tell you what my dr told me and it made me realize how precious life and afterlife is. He said a miscarriage is GODs way of sending a baby back to heaven that may have serious abnormalities that i could not deal with. i had the dnc in april 03 and was pregnant by june!!! keep your head up sis!!!

 

[Makeup Emporium]

Hi, first I want to say that I am so sorry for your loss. I have not experienced it personally but I went through it with a friend. I worked with her and one day she came to my desk with a terrified look on her face and told me she was spotting (I was one of the only ones who knew she was pregnant) and asked if I would take her to the hospital. So we both left in the middle of the work day and I stayed with her the whole time. Her husband is a police officer and we could not get in touch with him so I stayed and then I took her home afterwards. My heart went out to her and to anyone that goes through this. I tried to be strong for her but the two of us both cried like crazy!!

I have since come to find out that it is very common to have miscarriages with first pregnancies and that there is also a percentage of women who never even know that they've had one. If it is very early and they do not even know they are pregnant then they just think it's a heavy period.

I have quite a few friends who have gone through this that now have happy, healthy children. So just take care of yourself and when you're ready and your Dr. says you're ready then you can try again.

Take care!

 

[foxxylatina07]

Aww I'm so sorry for your lost. I had a similar experience but with the exception that I was pregnant with twins and I lost one. Let me tell you the day I found out I cried so much and my husband was there all the way. They told me that I had to go again the following day to get some blood drawn to see if the hormone levels had gone down. Well we went back and got the blood drawn and left town to go to a friends house. The doctor called back and told me that the hormone levels had gone UP. We were all confused (because I was feeling the signs of nausea) even the doctor. So we went back on a Monday he had called Saturday night. I waited as they examined me but I had already resign to the lost. Well to make a long story short the doctor comes back and tells me that they had found a heartbeat in the uterus!! What?? I was still pregnant?? Then my husband told his sister and that's when it hit me that I was pregnant with twins and that I had lost one and the other survived. So my little girl is my miracle baby whose baby brother or sister watched over her all that time.

I know that when you least expect it you'll get pregnant again. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Hang in there and have faith in God that he'll send you that blessing to your life again.