two things: how to deal with stress and how to deal nonexistant self worth?

[pinkhandgrenade]

seriously.

so i'm usually pretty chill, but every now and then, i get super stressed. and for the most part, i can handle it well, as in, i won't toally go off on someone or break down (unless it's ridiculously intense and i have other issues). but when i have a lot going on, suhc as right now, i notice that i don't eat, i don't sleep, i drink a lot, i drug a lot. and that's TOTALLY no bueno.

so tell me, how do you deal wiht stress? and don't tell me sex.

and for my other question, it's come to my attention that i have no self worth. i never realy thought about it until someone pointed it out. for example, i met this guy the other night and now he texts me all the time. he seems really nice--too nice for me. i don't deserve him. there's nothing special about me, i'm pretty much a trainwreck, if that makes sense. and i don't know. it's like, everything i do is not sufficient, i'm never happy with how i look or anything i do. le sigh.

 

[Willa]

Maybe you should try something really easy
I did it and its helping

You make a list of what you like and dislike about yourself, your life. After that, you think about what you can do to emphase what you like, and what you can do to change what you don't.

I think the whole stress situation is due to the fact that you don't really like yourself. It's like a wheel, you don't like yourself - you don't know yourself well - you can't deal with situations etc...

 

[Shimmer]

Unfortunately there's no magic bullet, you have to work it through your own way.

The idea of making a list and doing some self evaluation is a good one, but only if you're honest with yourself about your weaknesses AND your strengths.

I wouldn't advise getting involved with a guy on anything other than a very very casual basis right now, as you seem to be in the middle of emotional upheaval right now.

Find something you're good at...singing, reading, basket weaving, taking care of animals at shelters, rock climbing, gardening, whatever, and do it and do it well, and enjoy that. You would be amazed how much the enjoyment of doing something well will help your life and sense of self worth.

 

[Beauty Mark]

Well, it sounds like you need to get yourself under control. I don't know the source of your stress, but some people find physical activity (I'm not talking sex) relaxing. Running, going to the gym, etc. Sometimes a good cry is helpful or talking to a friend or family member.

If you think you have no self-worth- are you surrounding yourself with people who pick you apart all the time? Negative people will bring you down. In order to feel good about yourself, you need to find what makes you happy and do that activity as much as you can. I realize you're probably busy but that hour or two a week will not be that much and can improve your life drastically.

 

[SparklingWaves]

You are important and you do matter. You deserve to feel good and good about yourself.

Reflect on the stressers for just a moment. Are they provoking the cycle of how you handle the stress? You can come up with new healthier methods of handling the stress.

What things did you enjoy as a child? Was it painting, writing, drawing, physical activities, etc.? Tap into those things. Join groups with your common interests.

I am glad you are here.

 

[makeup_wh0re]

I had the same problems you are having, I tried to figure out what I could do. I always cut myself down. I went to the doctor to talk to them about it, I was just so discouraged with everything. When I went I found out something that shocked me. I had/have bipolar disorder. That has been such a hard thing for me to deal with. I needed medicine to get me out of all that funk. I moved and I can't go to the doctor I was seeing where I used to live so right now I am without my meds until my new doctors appointment on the 25th of January!! (that is what happens when you move to a huge town) It sucks b/c with Christmas coming around I know I am going to do and say mean things and just feel so sad about myself . It sucks to feel that way. You are a woman! Do your hair! Do your makeup! Get a really good friend and you talk it out with her. You must be something pretty special if this guy is texting you nonstop. Sorry about the long story too lol. Everyone gets stressed out when they have alot to deal with, and everyone sometimes flies off the handle. That doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you normal. At least you realize that you are doing it, and you are trying to figure out how to stop it, now that says alot about you.

 

[SparklingWaves]

I just wanted to follow-up with you.

I was wanting to know how you were doing, since you posted.

 

[pinkhandgrenade]

Quote:

Originally Posted by SparklingWaves I just wanted to follow-up with you. I was wanting to know how you were doing, since you posted.

awww you're sweet!

well i'm totally not stressed anymore with finals being done, but now i'm CONSTANTLY emo, and am almost refusing to date a guy i met a few weeks ago because he's too good for me. seriously. he's nice. my friends LOVE him. he respects me in that he gets i'm not one of those girls that always wants to be held, etc. but i don't want to ate him. he's too nice and i'm going to screw him over.

so really, i'm not doing any better. if anything, worse.

UHG. i seriously need to get this together.

 

[SparklingWaves]

I am glad you are done with finals. I hope you did well with them. Please don't be, so hard on yourself. You are worth just as much as anyone one else in the world. You really do deserve to feel better. Keeping you in my thoughts. Peace.