ugh!

[amelia.jayde]

i hate it when people have a problem with you and they wont just be straight up and tell you. they just act all weird around you, avoid you, or say they don't wanna talk to you anymore or whatever.

my friend hasn't said a word to me in a week and she just told me now that she "doesn't feel like talking to me right now," but she wont tell me why, 'cause she thinks i'll get mad. i'm not stupid. i've known for a while now that she has a problem with me, from the way she's been acting and i'm prepared to talk about it, without getting mad. that's why i confronted her, in the first place and asked her if she's been ignoring me.

but she damn blew that now, because i think it's completely unfair on me to have to sit here knowing full well that she has a problem with me, but not have the chance to do explain, defend myself, or do anything about it at all, because i don't know what the fuck i did. i'm 10 times as mad now, as i would have been.

looking back on our past few conversations, i really have not done anything that should upset her, unless she's just taking something the wrong way.

 

[CaraAmericana]

How good of a friend would you say she was? Is she your BFF? I had a friend who acted like that, like she was mad at me and ignored me but never bothered to tell me why, Turns out thru another friend I found out that she sleeped with one of my ex flings and must have been feeling guilty an d tried to turn it all aroun d on me. Didn't work for her.

So may be there is something else going on. Maybe she has something to tell you.

 

[amelia.jayde]

she's a really good online friend, who i've known for almost two years now. i don't think it's anything like that, she just always gets mad at me over little things.

 

[CaraAmericana]

oh ok, well I am just going to say-sounds like she is an immature child.

 

[kimmy]

if she's ignoring you, don't waste your time trying to get her attention. i've been there and done that, and it ain't worth it.

sorry you're having to deal with this, i know there's very few things more aggrivating than someone who won't just be up front with you.

 

[gigglegirl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by amelia.jayde i hate it when people have a problem with you and they wont just be straight up and tell you. they just act all weird around you, avoid you, or say they don't wanna talk to you anymore or whatever. my friend hasn't said a word to me in a week and she just told me now that she "doesn't feel like talking to me right now," but she wont tell me why, 'cause she thinks i'll get mad. i'm not stupid. i've known for a while now that she has a problem with me, from the way she's been acting and i'm prepared to talk about it, without getting mad. that's why i confronted her, in the first place and asked her if she's been ignoring me. but she damn blew that now, because i think it's completely unfair on me to have to sit here knowing full well that she has a problem with me, but not have the chance to do explain, defend myself, or do anything about it at all, because i don't know what the fuck i did. i'm 10 times as mad now, as i would have been. looking back on our past few conversations, i really have not done anything that should upset her, unless she's just taking something the wrong way.

Okay is there something in the water? B/c this is happening to me RIGHT NOW TOO! So freaking annoying. I'm fed up. It stresses me out even though I don't think I did anything! I'm with ya girl....these games are stupid and just need to stop. I value my friends and would never treat them like this so I get disheartened that others do this to me.

Its the same as what my mom does to me too.....argh!!!!!!!

 

[amelia.jayde]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gigglegirl Okay is there something in the water? B/c this is happening to me RIGHT NOW TOO! So freaking annoying. I'm fed up. It stresses me out even though I don't think I did anything! I'm with ya girl....these games are stupid and just need to stop. I value my friends and would never treat them like this so I get disheartened that others do this to me. Its the same as what my mom does to me too.....argh!!!!!!!

it really is annoying. i don't do things like that to my friends, either, so i feel that way too.

and thanks everyone for the comments and advice!

 

[SparklingWaves]

That's just outright hurtful to say she doesn't feel like speaking to you right now. This sounds like a controlling behavior to me. She is going to control when the communication lines are open. A healthy relationship involves open communication by both parties.

 

[alien21xx]

This sounds harsh, but it looks like your friend is just fishing for attention. I've done this before, to my sister no less, and she told me I was being an attention whore. Now that got me to wake up and smell reality that I really am being one, and I stopped being so childish once and for all.

 

[amelia.jayde]

Quote:

Originally Posted by SparklingWaves That's just outright hurtful to say she doesn't feel like speaking to you right now. This sounds like a controlling behavior to me. She is going to control when the communication lines are open. A healthy relationship involves open communication by both parties.

i really agree with you.

we still haven't said a word to eachother.

 

[jenii]

I recently had this problem with my husband. I felt like I must have been doing something wrong, to make him so frustrated with me, but he WOULD NOT TELL ME. He didn't feel like talking to me about it either, because he was worried I'd be confrontational about it.

I asked him what was bothering him, and it turned out to be job-related stress, but he wasn't about to just approach me with his problems, I had to get them out of him.

Here is what you should do: Take her aside, and ask her what's bothering her. Don't bring yourself into it, don't make it about how she's acting, just make it about something bothering her, and you being concerned about it.

See, if you confront them with "WHAT DID I DO?" they feel like they're being attacked and they don't wanna talk to you about anything ("jeez, if she's this mad ALREADY..."). If you just say "what's been bothering you lately?" they will be more likely to tell you honestly.

Chances are, it's nothing you did. Sometimes, life just gets people down and it can seem like they're mad at you personally, when really they're just frustrated about other shit.