Uh oh!

[Wishie88]

I have a best friend named Renee, I haven't seen her in a year and I'm going to see her next month.
I'm worried though because she JUST recently got a boyfriend(her first) I've tried REALLY hard to be supportive of her, because I always felt bad that she was lonely.
But then she and I had a big fight because I'm worried that this guy will try to hurt her.
Initally our fight was because I told her I didn't like his hair, which really shouldn't have made her mad since she ALWAYS did that to me about my boyfriend. I no longer have a boyfriend but there are men in my life shes passed the same type of judgement on and said much worse things.
Normally I'd just be pissed off at her for putting a man ahead of me, but I'm pissed off and worried about her.

She told me one night and this is a direct quote "It was so cute the other night, Avi(her bf) Held me down, bit my nose and then sang, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. I hope you die" I told her then that that was NOT cute, nor was it normal relationship behaviour.

I'm really worried about her, because shes the type of girl who will do ANYTHING her boyfriend wants her to, as long as he'll stay with her.
And a lot of the things shes said have sent up BIG warning signs to me, and when I ask other people they say the same thing.

I don't know how to talk to her about it, and she wants me to meet her new boyfriend, but Honestly I can't do that without hating the guy thats not only hurting my best friend, but also taking her away from me.

I'm broken up about this.

 

[Pei]

I feel for you. Honestly there's nothin much u can do.

For, some girls might think u're jealous of her gettinga "good" BF, or even think that u're jealous becos she has been spending less time with you.

If i were you, i will look straight into her eyes and say this solemnly
"look, I really care for you. In another words, i don't wanna see u getting hurt. Just remember to think for yourself whenever u wanna do something for Avi" or things like that."

A short sincere, serious "warning"/advice might help.
Too much care = Naggin'

HTH =)

 

[Wattage]

I agree with Pei... there is not much you can do. Unfortunately, you have to let him and her be and let her go through the motions of her relationship - good or bad.

I recommend meeting him, but not saying anything either way to your friend about him. Let her know you are genuinely concerned and are there if she needs you but that you understand her need to have this relationship. Don't talk about it with your other friends... I don't think that will help the situation but rather make it worse.

Give her a hug and tell her you care!

Hang in there

 

[as_cute_as_pie]

go and meet him and form a opinion yourself
but i dont think you can get 'involved' as it will always come off in their eyes as 'their jealous cos i have a bf and they dont'
i had a horrible bf then got back with him a year later despite on both occasions my friends told me to stay away as he was PURE EVIL lol ok he wasnt evil but he was just ignorant and bleurgh
my friend has a bf at the minute who is a PSYCHO and once came to a mini party we were havin drunk all OUR alcohol and told us he was going to burn the house down

shes said shes actually scared of him and tells us countless stories and were all like well why are you with him and shes all 'cos i love him' though she doesnt and sees the teeny weeny gd bit in him
its hard cos friends really dont listen lol

 

[lara]

I absolutely agree with Pei. Be honest and forthright with her, but apart from that there's nothing much you can do apart from having tissues on standby, keep a very close eye on her and be ready to help your friend when she asks you to in any way you can.

 

[Wishie88]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pei I feel for you. Honestly there's nothin much u can do. For, some girls might think u're jealous of her gettinga "good" BF, or even think that u're jealous becos she has been spending less time with you. If i were you, i will look straight into her eyes and say this solemnly "look, I really care for you. In another words, i don't wanna see u getting hurt. Just remember to think for yourself whenever u wanna do something for Avi" or things like that." A short sincere, serious "warning"/advice might help. Too much care = Naggin' HTH =)

Thank you, I will try and do that, she hasn't offically spoken to me since the whole thing.
But when I see her, I'll tell her things along those lines and hope for the best.

I guess I'll meet Avi, and maybe see if I just misjudged the situation of if I should be relly worried.
Thank you so much for the advice!