When he can't keep it up...

mariecinder

Well-known member
I've been hooking up with this guy for a while. He's a good friend that I've known for about 8 years now. He is the best lover I've ever had. The sexual chemistry between us is amazing. However, last night we were hanging out and we were home alone. We decided to fool around and when it came time to penetrate me, he seemed to lose his erection. We managed, but the only way I could get him to finish was by oral. Later that night we were fooling around again, the foreplay was fantastic and he was fine during oral but once we tried to do more, he lost it. He seemed to be really frustrated by it and apologized. I asked if it was me, he said no, that he was just thinking too much.

I'm just a little weirded out because I would never expect him of all people to have this problem because he is a very sexual person. Have any of you girls gone through this? What has your guys said is the reason?

(Btw I really like this guy and the thought of him not being attracted to me freaks me out. We've had sex tons of times with no problem before.)
 

Beauty Mark

Well-known member
Stress? Medication? It does happen from time to time. However, if it keeps happening, he might want to talk to a doctor
 

mariecinder

Well-known member
I know that it could be all kinds of things. But I can't help worrying about it a bit too much. Isn't that just like us girls? lol
 

User93

Well-known member
i believe you cant really say he has a problem after 1 case like that, it happends if the guy is simply nerveous, stressed, tired. I believe he feels bad about it himself, so you could just cheer him, tell him you understand its just being tired, and try again one day
tong.gif


I think as you have some background in your relationship as friends he could easyly be too nerveous about it, and thats all.
 

kimmy

Well-known member
is there any chance that he's interested in more than just hooking up with you? perhaps he's thinking about a relationship with you, and when faced with sex, it throws him off because he's thinking about being more than just hook up buddies.
 

girlsaidwhat

Well-known member
It's important that you be supportive and not make it an issue. You don't want to... up his internal pressure about it, because it'll keep things from going well moving forward.

If you've had sex plenty of times just fine...just trust him, that his brain wasn't able to stay in the right place, and leave it at that. Don't try to make it personal...I have no doubt it's really not about you.
 

mariecinder

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by kimmy
is there any chance that he's interested in more than just hooking up with you? perhaps he's thinking about a relationship with you, and when faced with sex, it throws him off because he's thinking about being more than just hook up buddies.

As much as I would love this, I don't think its the case. I've expressed my feelings to him before about how I think we would make a great couple but he totally shot it down.

But you never know...he was acting kind of different.
 

SkylarV217

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissChriss
Its probably just what he says "he was thinking too much" . Sex is mostly mental.

Could he be attracted to another girl or have feelings for someone else ?
 

SkylarV217

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by mariecinder
As much as I would love this, I don't think its the case. I've expressed my feelings to him before about how I think we would make a great couple but he totally shot it down.

But you never know...he was acting kind of different.


this may be the problem too , he may feel bad for leading you on if thats the case
 

Mizz.Yasmine

Well-known member
honestly i think after some point just being ''friends'' who have sex isnt a turn-on anymore. at 1st it was prob so hot and exciting but i believe after awhile u cant not have deeper or atleast mixed feelings 4 someone u are sharing ur body with, u know?
 

mariecinder

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by SkylarV217
Could he be attracted to another girl or have feelings for someone else ?

This is the reason I don't want to think about...but is possible.
 

Kalico

Well-known member
Hehe, my guy (whom I've been with for about 3 years now) was like that in the beginning. It freaked me out and really upset me because we started out fine and about 3 months into it he started having problems. It hasn't happened since but I think it was psychological. He had a lot of issues with wanting to please me to the point that I think it seriously distracted him from pleasing himself. I think the best thing you can do is focus on enjoying yourself so that he can focus on himself... yaknow?
 

couturesista

Well-known member
Quote:
Originally Posted by kimmy
is there any chance that he's interested in more than just hooking up with you? perhaps he's thinking about a relationship with you, and when faced with sex, it throws him off because he's thinking about being more than just hook up buddies.

I was thinking the same thing.
thmbup.gif
Try talking to him about it, and let him know how you feel and that he shouldn't be embarassed.
** Sorry, just read your other post on the subject, my bad****
 

mariecinder

Well-known member
Thanks for all the imput ladies. I really like this guy and now I'm thinking way too much about this!

Of course that's another whole topic all together...
 

juicygirl

Well-known member
aww, hang in there girl. it sucks but i am sure the next time will be better. i agree with kimmy, maybe he's now into you, or maybe he was just stressed that day about work/school/finances.
 

mona lisa

Well-known member
It could be a number of things including stress, overthinking things, or whatever. As far as a "solution" goes, talking it out does not hurt but if he does not want to, try not to push it. And of course there is always red wine and pumpkin seeds if looking for natural aids to stimulate the libido...
th_DANCE.gif
 

Latest posts

Top