pinkhandgrenade
Well-known member
i once told myself that i would never fall in love again.
that was after a really, really fcked up two year relationship that kind of fizzled out. and i just didn't want to ever love again.
two years later i meet someone in a random class that i'm taking, we start hanging out and i'm thinking, he and i are just friend. things get intense, and i fight him over and over and over. because the more i like someone, the more likely i am to fight them. i tell him he's too good for, i give him every reason to not want to be with me, including cheating on him.
and the thing is, i do all of this to sabotage myself because relationships scare the SHIT out of me. i had one that was so fcking ridiculous and messed up, i've seen too many fall apart, etc.
and i've suddenly realized i can't control whether or not i fall in love with someone. and of course, i figure this out when it's too late and he has finally given up.
and once again, i'm telling myself i never want to fall in love again.
WTF is wrong with me?
yeah this is sosososo random.
that was after a really, really fcked up two year relationship that kind of fizzled out. and i just didn't want to ever love again.
two years later i meet someone in a random class that i'm taking, we start hanging out and i'm thinking, he and i are just friend. things get intense, and i fight him over and over and over. because the more i like someone, the more likely i am to fight them. i tell him he's too good for, i give him every reason to not want to be with me, including cheating on him.
and the thing is, i do all of this to sabotage myself because relationships scare the SHIT out of me. i had one that was so fcking ridiculous and messed up, i've seen too many fall apart, etc.
and i've suddenly realized i can't control whether or not i fall in love with someone. and of course, i figure this out when it's too late and he has finally given up.
and once again, i'm telling myself i never want to fall in love again.
WTF is wrong with me?
yeah this is sosososo random.