Need work advice. I don't know what to do

akcmommy

Well-known member
I am having difficulty at work. I am in the midst of a conflict with someone at my work that has been there less than a year longer than me. She treats me like I am her underling and speaks to me with contempt.

She made an error, I asked her to fix it and she ran to the sr attorney to complain about me, tears and all. *I* am the one that got talked to about my demeanor. The clear chain of command was breached. She was supposed to speak to our office manager if she has any issues.

Since that confrontation, she has taken every opportunity to throw me under the bus.

2 weeks ago, we were in a meeting with one of the sr attorneys, the 3 associate attorneys and one other assistant. We had a case where the defendant called us to ask for information but did not give us an address to mail the information to. I asked if the defendant was served at home. She glared at me and said, "*I* do *my* research." She had 2 associate attorneys sitting on either side of her. All I wanted to know was if the defendant was served at work, could we mail the letter there.

The following day, I spoke with one of the attorneys and asked if I was being sensitive or if she has been snippy with me. The attorney agreed that she was snippy.

I went to the office manager and voiced my concerns about the treatment that I was receiving. The office manager suggested that I have a conversation with my coworker or she would mediate between the 2 of us. She said that she is not willing to get in the middle of our conflict.

Today, during our weekly meeting, one of the associate attorneys asked me why a case was on a different report than he thought it should be. While I was telling him, she jumped in to say that she "told" me to do it last week.

After the meeting, the attorney pulled me aside to say that he did not mean to cause more trouble than there already was between me and her. We started talking about the problems that we are having. I told him that at this point, I am avoiding her as much as possible. He suggested that the negative reaction I am receiving from her is partially my own doing.

Maybe it is. But I am pissed off. She is very two-faced. She is one way with the attorneys and another with her co-workers. She comes in late every day, clocks in, then spends 10 minutes putting her bike away and freshening up in the restroom. Because the way our office is set up, no one but me can really see what is going on. It aggravates me because our office is having to take unpaid furlough days because of the economy and she is stealing company time every day.

She has a condescending way of asking me to help with her workload when she is not doing what she is supposed to do. Example: we are both supposed to return voice mail messages. There are 2 types, type A and type B. I am trained to return both types and she is only responsible for type b. She sent me an email suggesting that because I am not pulling my fair share of type B, they are a week behind. I started keeping a log of how many messages she is returning and how many I am returning. For June, out of 100 type A messages and 47 type B messages, I returned 40 messages and she returned 9. 9!

She has the audacity to mention that I am not pulling my weight?

ARGH!

It is obvious that management is not going to do anything. I can't find another job right now. There is NOTHING else out there.

Any suggestions?
 

gildedangel

Well-known member
Unfortunetly law firms are full of people like this, you may even encounter it again if you moved to another firm. Just keep your chin up and your head held high, and keep taking tabs on how much work she is doing versus how much you are doing. If she is rude and jumps in at a meeting just say in a polite way, "excuse me, may I finish now?". If she wants to give you some of her workload, tell her that you are sorry but you have your own work to do in the kindest manner that you can. Law firms are sometimes all about acting. The best thing that you can do is be as kind and polite as you can be, because that will make her look like an idiot in front of the rest of your collegues. If you don't play her game, she will eventually move on to some other unlucky person. Good luck!
 

Shimmer

Well-known member
Do your job, avoid conflict, make sure your T's are crossed and your I's are dotted.
Perhaps a meeting within your chain of command would help. :/



If it were me, and I were in a meeting and she interrupted me or made a smart ass comment, she would get a simple blank stare until she shut up, then another three seconds or so longer with a slow blink then a head turn while I resume my conversation, intentionally leaving her out. Let her flop on the wind looking like a jackass.
 

HeatherLouWho

Well-known member
It sounds like she is a difficult person to work with and she sounds pretty unprofessional.

However, I would caution you not to get caught up in her petty games. When you start monitoring her comings, goings, and workload it can backfire and make you look bad. The fact is that if they really cared about her bathroom time, they would say something about it. But they don't.

What they do care about is having professional assistants. So you have to be the professional assistant and let her be the petty/bossy/lazy/bitchy one. If she gets snappy in a meeting, thank her for her input and finish your point, and move on. Don't mull it over with co-workers. If she says you aren't pulling your load politely ask her how she suggests the work be divided or kindly suggest a team meeting with the Office Manager so that you can figure out a workable solution. In time, people will see her for what she is and she'll either get the boot or quit. Until then, you just have to focus on doing your job, doing it well, and rising above the fray.

I was an administrative assistant for several years before going to law school. I often dealt with co-workers like her so I can really sympathize with your situation. Unfortunately, people like that are everywhere and you have to learn not to let it get under your skin. And I say learn because it is a natural human reaction to want things to be fair.

I would also add that most attorneys I know have zero patience for these kinds of antics...so as hard as it is, don't return her "favors" and hopefully she'll work herself out the door
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Good Luck!
 

Lapis

Well-known member
I've worked with people like her before, I'd ignore her, it's hard but do it.
Do your job, if she thinks she has too much work be like ok let's go to who ever you immediate superior is and discuss, the more she bitches the better you look!
 

BeautyizPain

Well-known member
omg..i can kind of relate to your situation but unfortunately for me it was my boss that was the immature idiot in the situation...all i can say is document, document, document..keep any correspondences between the 2 of you and keep tabs on the work you are doing. I personally went right for my HR department because i had no idea where to start..after getting advice from them i went to her boss..well lets just say after numerous meetings the situation finally came to an end when she was demoted! i was sooo happy but i learned a great deal from the situation..keep your cool, document everything and handle the situation as professional as you can and eventually the other party will either quit or have other consequences brought upon them..and most of the time its not in their favor at all..just like the saying "what goes around comes around" ..stay strong and professional and let her make an idiot out of herself because that is what she is...good luck
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