Have you ever feel offended by...

[M.A.C. head.]

I wouldn't say that I've grown insensitive to it, but I don't get as offended or defensive over it as I used to. There are things in the media, even here on Specktra, in this very topic that get on my nerves; but the people behind the comments are of no matter to me, so I just move to the next thing.

The internet in particular is the world's septic tank. People can say anything they want, so I don't take this stuff to heart, because 9 times out of 10, they wouldn't have the balls to make those jokes are say those things in reality. That being said, if something happens in my day to day life that I find offensive, I speak up, it'd be wrong of me not to.

 

[Mabelle]

Quote:

Originally Posted by OfficerJenny What offends me the most is when people make gay jokes, or insults something by calling it gay, around me, then are like "no offense no i don't mean anything against gay people" if you don't have anything against them, then why is it an insult

THANK YOU!!!

I'm straight, but that doesn't even matter. I don't understand why someone would us ethe world "gay" as an insult. I mean, arne't we snesible people for equality??
Gay means homosexual, or happy. Saying "ohimgod being grounded by your parents is so gay" is obvisouly not using the term the way it's supposed to be used. Why would you attach more "negativity" to a word that is positive or nutral. It makes me crazy. Not to mention, it makes the user sound like a flippin moron.

Also, using the word fag/faggot as an insult (towards gay or straight people). Aguy in my classes was using the word faggott all year, finally i got pissed off at him, and he proceeded in calling me a "fucking bitch". Slowly but surely i'm trying to ween all my classmates off using homophobic slurs (they're all stupid and 16- or 17) unfortunatly it's taking longer than i hoped.

 

[OfficerJenny]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mabelle THANK YOU!!! I'm straight, but that doesn't even matter. I don't understand why someone would us ethe world "gay" as an insult. I mean, arne't we snesible people for equality?? Gay means homosexual, or happy. Saying "ohimgod being grounded by your parents is so gay" is obvisouly not using the term the way it's supposed to be used. Why would you attach more "negativity" to a word that is positive or nutral. It makes me crazy. Not to mention, it makes the user sound like a flippin moron. Also, using the word fag/faggot as an insult (towards gay or straight people). Aguy in my classes was using the word faggott all year, finally i got pissed off at him, and he proceeded in calling me a "fucking bitch". Slowly but surely i'm trying to ween all my classmates off using homophobic slurs (they're all stupid and 16- or 17) unfortunatly it's taking longer than i hoped.

Yaaay! I hate how ignorant the kids at my high school can be :c

 

[macslut]

I tend to get offended over the way groups are portrayed in movies, the media, and in general life. No, not all Southerners are hicks. Not all gays are flamboyant. No, not everyone from NYC is rude. Probably no one from Eastern Europe is a Borat wannabe. And, no, not everyone in my region thinks that oddly shaped straws should be pulled from the shelf at Walmart because it is shaped like "the p word". (google "crazy straws" and "walmart") Seriously, people need to expand their thinking and stop this generalization bullshit. (There are some theories about what this happens, but people can still fight that sort of thinking.)

 

[Mabelle]

Quote:

Originally Posted by OfficerJenny Yaaay! I hate how ignorant the kids at my high school can be :c

i called someone out on this once in a makeup group and got flamed. They started saying "oh well does someone saying there straight edge offend you"

people are stupid.

And saying things like "ohmigod, thats so gay" makes you sound stupid. Use words how they're meant to be used. We have soooo many words in the english language. Why do you need to take one and appropriate another meaning to it. It makes you sound stupid
. the ennnddddd

 

[Hilly]

When I was in Elementary school in Chicago, it was unpopular if you were "white." If you were Polish..omg you were considered a loser. At the time, I used to hide that I was Polish and would always boast my "hispanic" side so I wouldnt get teased. Now I could careless (this was 11, 12 years ago).

It was sad.

 

[fillintheblank]

Quote:

Originally Posted by glamdoll I understand what you are saying, but let me just say that a lot of people don't understand the circumstances of illegal immigrants from Mexico. Its not "it takes a little longer" the truth is, it takes A LOT of money, land, and 'aquantainces' in order for someone to be approved for a visa, let alone a workers visa. Here in America we have poor, hungry, malnourished people and this is the world power country we are talking about! Now can you imagine how it is over there? There are a lot of towns w/o running water, they have to go to the well, and even then its not sanitary water. My cousin who is a teacher and has her own place in Mexico has been denied a visitors visa 3 times. In the other hand my grandma who inherited a lot of land from my great grandparents, she worked 29yrs for the government got approved, and still it took 6 months. People who leave not just their countries, but their families, EVERYTHING they know behind do it, out of desperation. They do not come with the intention of undercutting others here, they do not come w/ some sort of conspiracy to abuse government anything. They come out of desperation and trying to survive and help their families survive. I was born in Chicago but my childhood was spent in Mexico till I was like 7-8. I went to school there and I can tell you from PERSONAL EXPERIENCE that it IS as bad as it sounds. And we were "middle class" too. Because I know the lifestyle there I know why they are here and I empathize with them. Anyone who loves their family will do ANYTHING to go to a better place. A lot of them lose their lives trying to cross the border, because its either they die at the border or they die of starvation at home, so that is why. I wish there was still amnesties that are available for everyone. the last one for Mexicans was 1989 thats the one my mom applied (and thank God) was approved. I just think that no one should judge anyone's actions specially if you have never been in their shoes. OK sorry long post. I am just very passionate about this. I want to inform people that its not as easy as "oh sign up for a visa and wait a little" I wish!! i truly do, because then they wouldnt have to work such shitty jobs and endure such abuse.

thank you. a lot of my friends parents have come here from south america with nothing because they were desperate. coming to the states legally is not easy.

also, I'm Christian. its amazing how close minded some people can be.

 

[laperle]

Hi.

This is a very interesting thread. I'm brazilian and live in Rio.

Starting with films and TV series, I must say EVERY single one shows a completely wrong idea of our geography, culture and people.

They show snakes in Rio airport, Copacabana beach in Sao Paulo (the city is far from the ocean), favela all over, Carnival in the streets ALL the time and the worst, IMO: girls in thong bikinis looking like hookers at the beach. Ah! We can't forget about brazilian people being portraited as speaking spanish. A little research, please?

My brother was very bad treated in Italy, people thought he was arab and was a thief. WTF? The boy is an Air Force Pilot. And what the hell with these people assuming an arab MUST be dangerous?

I used to work for international film festivals and also travelled a lot and I've heard all sorts of things during all these years. Some people say they can't believe I'm brazilian, 'cos I look so french! Is this a freaking compliment? I love France, but saying something like this offend my country, 'cos here we have it all and I can't even tell you all my heritage because I don't care about this. I have a gorgeous deep chocolate skinned cousin and her sister is lighter than an NC15!

When I lived in France, all sorts of tourists stopped me to ask for information assuming I was french. People asked me to take pictures with them. They all looked shocked when they found out I wasn't french, because my french, my languages, my education, my clothes don't match their idea of a brazilian girl. This is insulting.

I hate all sorts of offensive ways to treat other cultures, religions, countries and races (though, I personally dislike this race thing. I think we are all humans and jokes or comments that diminish others are just disgusting).

Maybe I'm too radical on this. I don't even like to be compared to movie stars nor other people. Some foreigners insist to tell me I look like Catherine Zeta-Jones and I just don't really think I have to thank anyone for saying so. I don't think I look like her and if I did, I wouldn't like, because I like being unique.

Plus, this whole 'What's your heritage?' kinda talk turns me off. I'm just brazilian. I wish I was even more mixed than I already am.

------------------------

A colombian girl said something about the world seeing her country as a nation of drug dealers. It's annoying.

 

[babiid0llox]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Celly I am half Black and half Samoan. I get offended when people hear that I am half Samoan and automatically assume everyone in my family is fat. I get this one a lot. "who's Samoan" I reply "my mom" then always end up saying something like this, "dang your mom must be BIG huh?" People can be so ignorant. Just because some one is Samoan doesn't automatically mean that person if fat. I have a lot of family member who are over weight and a lot who aren't so stop assuming you make an ASS of yourself.

Oh gosh I hate that too, and I'm not even Samoan! Say 8 out of 10 Samoan girls I see are stunning and not at all 'big', I'm not saying big people aren't good-looking in anyway but the notion that all Pacific Islanders, Samoan or not are massive is ridiculous.

Grr

 

[brave_venus]

I am in an interracial marriage, and it's not a foreign thing for me to be offended often with my in-laws...but in all, I respect them. but I get VERY offended when one of them asks me what I think of this issue and that issue amongst the african-american community. Yes, I am african-american and very proud of it, but I am getting really tired of being the spokesperson of my people on behalf of them.

 

[Sass E]

I have had my share of experiences over the years, I'll share a few..

I was offended when a previously good friend of mine informed me, " You're lucky your children are so light, they can definitely pass for being white, that's a plus for them!". I'm Mexican, Spanish and Portuguese. My husband is White.

When I told one of my favorite professors in college that I had decided to major in Ethnic Studies with an emphasis in Native American Studies he responded. "What are you gonna do with that, manage a casino?".

I was having dinner with a former dance teacher and I'm not sure how the conversation transitioned, it can happen so quickly sometimes but she jumped into the immigration issue in AZ...she then stated, "I don't care if it's women and children out dying in the desert, I wouldn't give them the shirt off my back or a drop of water to drink, I don't want those wet backs coming over my border! Of course I don't mean you.."

This was about 4 months ago.. I was shopping at the Goodwill and there was a woman complaining to a manager next to me where I was looking through the racks. She was "very upset" because she felt her shopping experience had been ruined because when she asked for help, "the people back there" could only respond in broken English. She was telling the manager, "All employees should have training in English so customers like me didn't have to be so frustrated". She then said to the manager, "They all would benefit from learning english, they all would love to know how to help us, they all want to learn english".. Then she put her hand on my shoulder, I turned (wtf?) and said to me in a loud, slow voice......."Don't cha?!"

I will not divulge the ethnicity of the people above because in my opinion, it's more important to recognize their ignorance as the problem.

I personally appreciate everyone sharing their perspectives, I'm sure it's liberating for those of us who are able to get these horrible experiences off our chests and helpful to those who choose to read our stories and learn from them with us.

So thanks!

 

[couturesista]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sass E I have had my share of experiences over the years, I'll share a few.. I was offended when a previously good friend of mine informed me, " You're lucky your children are so light, they can definitely pass for being white, that's a plus for them!". I'm Mexican, Spanish and Portuguese. My husband is White. When I told one of my favorite professors in college that I had decided to major in Ethnic Studies with an emphasis in Native American Studies he responded. "What are you gonna do with that, manage a casino?". I was having dinner with a former dance teacher and I'm not sure how the conversation transitioned, it can happen so quickly sometimes but she jumped into the immigration issue in AZ...she then stated, "I don't care if it's women and children out dying in the desert, I wouldn't give them the shirt off my back or a drop of water to drink, I don't want those wet backs coming over my border! Of course I don't mean you.." This was about 4 months ago.. I was shopping at the Goodwill and there was a woman complaining to a manager next to me where I was looking through the racks. She was "very upset" because she felt her shopping experience had been ruined because when she asked for help, "the people back there" could only respond in broken English. She was telling the manager, "All employees should have training in English so customers like me didn't have to be so frustrated". She then said to the manager, "They all would benefit from learning english, they all would love to know how to help us, they all want to learn english".. Then she put her hand on my shoulder, I turned (wtf?) and said to me in a loud, slow voice......."Don't cha?!" I will not divulge the ethnicity of the people above because in my opinion, it's more important to recognize their ignorance as the problem. I personally appreciate everyone sharing their perspectives, I'm sure it's liberating for those of us who are able to get these horrible experiences off our chests and helpful to those who choose to read our stories and learn from them with us. So thanks!

All of these stories remind of someone who is racist but says " but I have friends who are ........" like that makes a difference. If ur racist ur racist regardless of the ethnicity of ur friends. White men slept with their slaves and had children with them too but at the end of the day , they were still the white man's slaves.

 

[benzito_714]

Quote:

Originally Posted by aleksis210 I haven't really been offended by anything lately in movies, I think the ONLY thing that really offends me in a movie(not saying this happens a lot) is when a black guy nails a white girl just for the sake of a 'goal' I don't get it, but it really grosses me out...

this is a stereotype that bothers me as well. it makes it as if all black men just want to have sex with a white girl-the same as with white men sleeping with women of different ethnicities for a certain effect (ie-latin women for more fiery sex or asian women for submissive sex). or even (for sake of the first example) that all white women want to have sex with a black stud. these stereotypes often fuel the criticism of interracial relationships.

 

[fafinette21]

I get slightly offended with the Irish stereotype that we're all violent alcoholics. As soon as I tell anyone I'm Irish it's always "Oh!! So you must love to drink eh?" And I'm like um no not really, thanks for coming out.
I also hate Irish people that perpetuate that stereotype and use the fact that they are Irish to somehow excuse the fact that they drink too much. Just makes me ashamed that they are from the same country as me.

 

[SuSana]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sass E I was having dinner with a former dance teacher and I'm not sure how the conversation transitioned, it can happen so quickly sometimes but she jumped into the immigration issue in AZ...she then stated, "I don't care if it's women and children out dying in the desert, I wouldn't give them the shirt off my back or a drop of water to drink, I don't want those wet backs coming over my border! Of course I don't mean you.."

Oh yeah that's the best, Mexicans are X, Y, Z, but of course I don't mean you! Well if you don't mean me, you are still talking about my family & friends, so you should keep your racist comments to yourself.

A friend I had would always say things about White people, but she would say, not you though since you're half Mexican too so you don't count. Once again, if you don't mean me, you're still talking about my family & friends so wth??

Some people I tell you, should not be allowed to speak in public.

 

[Nox]

Quote:

Originally Posted by glamdoll I just think that no one should judge anyone's actions specially if you have never been in their shoes. OK sorry long post. I am just very passionate about this. I want to inform people that its not as easy as "oh sign up for a visa and wait a little" I wish!! i truly do, because then they wouldnt have to work such shitty jobs and endure such abuse.

You don't have to inform me of anything. I am already quite versed with what people have to go through to get a visa and green card. And it can be hell. The problem I have with the whole situation is that, yes, it takes a lot of resources to go through the hoops, but what in the heck are all the other people in other continents supposed to do? Just not apply and see if they can get in anyway? Not even a slight option like that exists.

All I'm saying is, there are other people's "shoes" that are just as important.

My own parents are immigrants.

They came in the legal way, just like most of the other immigrants who have to cross an ocean to get here. Yes, some of the human tragedies are bad... real bad in the most desperate way. But again, I say, what about all the other people who have to wait, and perhaps die waiting, because they do not have the option of trekking by foot on land? Why should it be one rule for some people (selective amnesty) and another rule for others just because of their geographic location? But so goes the ever present occurrence of human migration, I guess. People always go where the opportunity is.

Interestingly, my parents and siblings agree with your stance, and not so much mine. Ironically enough, when I spoke to my parents about it, my stance softened a little bit, but I still have some reservations. Perhaps my issue is that I'm just too far removed from being in contact with someone in that situation to understand it. I don't know.

 

[S.S.BlackOrchid]

Quote:

Originally Posted by benzito_714 this is a stereotype that bothers me as well. it makes it as if all black men just want to have sex with a white girl-the same as with white men sleeping with women of different ethnicities for a certain effect (ie-latin women for more fiery sex or asian women for submissive sex). or even (for sake of the first example) that all white women want to have sex with a black stud. these stereotypes often fuel the criticism of interracial relationships.

Agreed! It is also very insulting because media portrays some races as sexier than others.

 

[mafalda]

laperle,

have you read Joao Ubaldo Ribeiro, "Um brasileiro em Berlim" - eu A DO REI. And I still have to tell people that it's not my Brazilian side that gave me the opportunity to learn Spanish at home.

I only read it in your contribution, but how about the others: How do you feel about people telling you "Wow, you don't look/sound/seem [insert the culture you identify with here]. I would have guessed you're [insert culture of host country here]." I am still wondering about that one...

 

[fafinette21]

Another one, although I'm not so much offended by it as I just think it's ignorant is that the idea that Canadians all have odd accents and we live in igloos and are crazy nature people.
I was in Florida once with my family and a bunch of other firefighters (my dad is one) and one of the security guards at the airport was like "So it must be cold up there." And so one of the firefighters was like "Oh definitely! You know the other day a polar bear floated down on an ice floe so I had to go out with my harpoon gun and shoot it so it wouldn't get the kids" And the guard said "Oh wow, that's awful". ....It was August.

 

[LoveMU]

i get offended by people dissing eastern europeans, or just ignoring us completely as a group. We're never portrayed in a positive light, ever. People are also EXTREMELY ignorant about Eastern European countries, assuming we are all some form of Russian, when I know that I myself and my family do not relate to Russians in any way, the culture, language, nothing!

i come from a small Eastern European country, and believe me, not many people even know it exists! Most people aren't even remotely interestd. Not that they have to be, but I guess it's not "cool" to be into that.