Worried About Giving Head

[kelly2509t]

Just wanted a lil' advice. I lost my V plates so to speak around a month ago so I'm still very inexperienced. The man has hinted a few time about me giving him oral when I'm comfortable, and don't get me wrong I'm very comfortable having sex with him but I just still don't feel comfortable about giving him head.

I suppose I'm just worried that I won't know what I'm doing and that I won't please him.

Any advice ladies would be fab!

 

[silentstorm143]

I find that oral sex is more intimate than regular sex so make sure you are very comfortable and really want to perform oral sex. Its all new to us at one point it takes time to perfect it and to learn what he likes and doesn't. You will find that it changes if you become intimate with someone else- he might not like the same things or the same way as your current partner does. So here are what I believe are general pointers
1) Talk to him about your concerns
2) NO TEETH unless requested lol
3) Go slow and pay attention to his reactions to the things you do
4)Ask while doing what your doing ask him do you like this does this feel good do you want me to slow down speed up etc usually you'll know by his actions and the sounds he makes if your doing something he likes.
If you want more advice or to know in graphic detail things to do ask a good girl friend ,watch a porno, read a book HTH
If you need to ask anything else let me know - I'm pretty comfortable with my sexuality so don't worry bout asking

 

[kaliraksha]

silentstorm gave you some great advice!

You're giving him undivided attention and physical pleasure. He knows you're new to the game. If he doesn't appreciate that then move on, simple as that! Don't be too nervous, sounds like he will guide you and be very understanding. Just be willing to listen and adapt. This is definitely one of those things that you get better at with experience. It might help to speak to him about your fears and then you will have the perfect partner for a first time experience. We do all have to start somewhere =)

I agree, oral sex is more intimate and for me it's reserved for someone I love. It's work! But if you're genuinely into it then there won't be any issues for either party, so make sure you don't do it 'til you are.

 

[kimmietrinh]

First off...try to calm down. He's already going to be so psyched that you're going to do it, and wanting to do it just for him. There's no exact right or wrong way-unless you just bite down and nearly kill him. Which is not going to happen. As others have said...different tips and different guys like it differently. Dont' read further if you don't like explicit material.

Some guys like less "sucking" action due to the sensitivity, but it all varies. Buttt, licking while you are sucking has won me compliments. Variate the pressure of your sucking. Before you get all started, tease. Don't go for the main attraction, build up the tension by kissing, licking, nibbling, whatever, everywhere else and slowly zone in closer. You can lick the very tip while you look in his eyes, and start paying more homage slowly. In the beginning just to get used to the feel of him and to slowly get comfy, slowly take him in while licking/sucking. If it feels too much at the time, you can just lick the length or his two friends. It's really what you feel comfy doing and what he likes. Good luck!

 

[xFlossy]

I find humming while sucking works well also play with the nuts lol that always wins points too.

I agree with watching porn. I mean you don't have to go as wild as the girls do, thats all for the camera, but just watching the technique etc is a good start.

 

[chocolategoddes]

I've heard smothering his penis in jelly and licking/ sucking it off is helpful.

 

[Shimmer]

I do not mix food and sex. *shudder*


Ok, giving head.

First off, relax. If you're tense and tentative, it isn't going to be good.
Second, relax your throat. Don't be afraid of spit/slobber. Wet head is good head.
Third, if you've got a strong gag reflex, work on it by brushing your tongue. It'll really help with being able to deep throat.

Finally, respond to him and what he seems to like. Some guys like long slow deep pulls, others like it fast and with more suction.

Listen to your guy. He'll give you guidance.

 

[LMD84]

hey hun! you have been given some awesome advice by the guys here!

But i thought i'd add that it's completely normal to be scared of having oral sex. it can be amazing for both you and him when giving him head but things will take time. I'm not ashamed to say that it took me a good few practises before i managed to make my hubby come through oral.

i actually find it's quite good to have some music on in the background while giving head. sometimes it's nice to 'bob to the beat' so to speak! plus the right music can make it seem even sexier for you and him

but take your time and listen to his reaction. his moans will tell you when you are doing it how he likes it

 

[Simply Elegant]

This is going to be a bit graphic so don't read on if you don't feel ok with that.

Suck fast and slow
look up at him
take it out and stroke it too
suck or lick his balls
rub it agains your face
stroke while licking balls
suck and lick the back of his shaft at the same time
just lick or suck the head at first
rub the area behind his balls while licking or sucking
Don't be afraid to enjoy it and get into it. The more fun you have, the better it'll be for him and the better he'll give to you.

Have fun

 

[buddleia]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kelly2509t I suppose I'm just worried that I won't know what I'm doing and that I won't please him.

You've got some good advice on specific techniques up above, so my comments are more general: Pretty much the first time you do anything (sex-related or not) it might be a little awkward or clumsy. It does take practice, just like everything else! I think (I hope!) it'll be more important to him that you put in the effort. I think that if you do that, plus enjoy it, that's enough to make him happy. Honing a specific technique or move can all come later - in the meantime, just try it out, enjoy it, get used to it, learn from the experience and apply what you've learned the next time. Also, listen and communicate with him! ("Harder? Faster? Don't use my hand?" Stuff like that.) Have fun! And: use protection unless you know for sure he doesn't have STDs.

 

[Junkie]

I always found that the wetter, the better - my bf agrees too because it mimicks what a vagina feels like with regular sex.

So don't be afraid to get spit all over your face or even in your hair. Oral sex means not being afraid to get messy.

If you do manage to deep throat, the mucous in the back of your throat is the extra slimey, stringy kind...lol...so sometimes it turns them on if they see that hanging from your mouth to their penis....its a porn thing hahaha. It also lubricates everything more than regular spit which tends to dry up faster.

 

[martiangurll]

Okay, while sucking a guy off is not high on my priority list (I am all about the ramming) then that being said, I agree with all the above.

Remember, if you are like me and get tired easy or your jaw gets sore--use your hand. Combination of a hand job with the actual oral can help increase the friction he may need to get to an orgasm. Also, don't forget the taint--that lil area between the scrotum and the anus--some licks there will really get him going. Caress the scrotum while you are doing the oral too--it helps. Every guy is different and will have different things that get him off, so it is okay to ask him to give you "directions"

For me, it helps to get really relaxed before the oral, which for me means at least one good shot (of tequila or whatever floats your boat). (I also pretend I am sucking a popsicle or lollypop inside my head, and this makes it so much easier.)

 

[liba]

Best advice I've got is use your neck muscles, not your jaw muscles, to move up and down. You won't get sore or tired out as easily and you'll be able to give him more good friction.

I actually learned this listening to some male co-workers joking around, and the little lightbulb went on over my head! Totally made a difference!

 

[BeccalovesMAC]

Just relax and have fun with it.

 

[Funtabulous]

I was going to suggest use your hands, and noticed it wasn't a common suggestion. Do guys generally not like that? I've found I've had the best success using a mix of both (with lots of saliva). It can also take the pressure off if you introduce the oral gradually, using mostly hands at first then using more mouth as you go along and get comfortable with the idea, instead of BAM it's there in your mouth and you don't know what you are doing.

 

[LMD84]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Funtabulous I was going to suggest use your hands, and noticed it wasn't a common suggestion. Do guys generally not like that? I've found I've had the best success using a mix of both (with lots of saliva). It can also take the pressure off if you introduce the oral gradually, using mostly hands at first then using more mouth as you go along and get comfortable with the idea, instead of BAM it's there in your mouth and you don't know what you are doing.

no i use my hands too! sometimes i think it may give the impression that more is in my mouth!

and playing with his balls is always good while giving him head.

 

[Shimmer]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Funtabulous I was going to suggest use your hands, and noticed it wasn't a common suggestion. Do guys generally not like that? I've found I've had the best success using a mix of both (with lots of saliva). It can also take the pressure off if you introduce the oral gradually, using mostly hands at first then using more mouth as you go along and get comfortable with the idea, instead of BAM it's there in your mouth and you don't know what you are doing.

definitely use the hands.
use them in conjunction with the motion of the mouth and add a twisting motion.

Plus, hand at the base keeps the guys who are thrusters from surprising you with a tonsil check.

 

[martiangurll]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shimmer definitely use the hands. use them in conjunction with the motion of the mouth and add a twisting motion. Plus, hand at the base keeps the guys who are thrusters from surprising you with a tonsil check.

I LOL'd

 

[LoraBrook]

If nothing else, make sure that you grip the base of his *ahem* buddy just incase he suddenly thrusts up. I learned that lesson the hard way. I had a few too many drinks to prepare myself and when he raised his hips, I threw up. This is 100% preventable!!!

 

[Goat Goat Etc.]

I think I'm beginning to lose my gag reflex, lol.

So as everyone's suggested:

• Use your hands
• Grip the base of the penis firm but don't strangle it
• Learn how to do things in conjuntion.

In addition:
Spit on it!
Make gagging sounds
Look up at him while you blow him
Do some tongue rolling!
-While you have his head in your mouth roll your tongue around it
-While your have his penis in mouth roll your entire tongue around it
-It helps if you roll your head too
Suck like a vacuum and breathe through your nose; i find I can manage both having tight suction and manipulation with my mouth but can also breathe.

Deepthroating? I'm thrown up alittle bit in my mouth, on his cock once but I immediately stopped breathing and swallowed my little bit of vomit.
(I stopped breathing because it can turn your taste buds off--holding your nose does it more effectively.) I moved on and kept blowing him-just best not to make it a big deal.
If your partner is mature and understands shit happens even better, lol.

HTH

But no sarcasm, think I'm over coming my gag reflex--guess practice makes perfect lol.